


reign of the heart

by alarminglyrmus



Category: All For The Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: Alternate Universe - Royalty, Fluff and Angst, Implied/Referenced Past Abuse, Knight!Jean, M/M, Minor Character Death, Mutual Pining, Prince!Jeremy, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-20
Updated: 2019-10-20
Packaged: 2020-12-27 04:28:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 24,605
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21112634
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alarminglyrmus/pseuds/alarminglyrmus
Summary: Was this what Icarus felt when he reached for the sun? This exhilarating feeling that took over one’s body? Until anything they felt was simply warmth, warmth, warmth. Jean felt like he was soaring, if only for a second. His world settled. His thought process ended and started on the same point: Jeremy.-In which Jean finds out the meanings for the words freedom, gold, home, and love.





	reign of the heart

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Junia](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Junia/gifts).

Blood. Screams. Explosions. Smoke. 

The Kingdom of Edgar was falling down into pieces. Every corner of the streets was up into flames. Farmers were hastily picking up their goods and retreating back into their houses. Children were running into the arms of their parents while crying. Those who had their houses invaded were looking for shelter near the border. Around a thousand civilians were now residing in the hospital after a coughing outbreak had started because of the explosions. Thirteen were now dead. 

Or at least that’s what a merchant told King Ichirou. 

“I appreciate that you came here to inform me of this even with all the commotion,” started the king, “but now that I have no use for you, you may leave.” 

The merchant stared at the king in shock. Of course, he had expected some type of reward in exchange for the information, but he should’ve known better than to expect that from Ichirou Moriyama. The merchant was led out of the main hall, his ragged clothes trailing after him.

“Jean Moreau.” Jean took his eyes off the merchant and turned to look at the king, a sense of dread already taking over him.

“Yes, Your Highness?” The words felt like lead coming out of his mouth. He already knew what was about to happen to him. 

“Come closer.” King Ichirou waited until he stood before him, tapping his fingers on the arm of his throne while considering the knight. It took some time before he finally spoke again, “I hereby declare the exile of Knight Jean Moreau of Kingdom Edgar. Reason for exile: not fulfilling his job to protect Prince Riko Moriyama, who now lies underneath the castle grounds.”

Jean felt the words like a blow to his chest. Had he already known this was going to happen? Yes. But there was no preparing him for the reality that had become his life in the last twenty-four hours. He pointedly ignored the gasps and murmurs of the royal court.

He took a deep breath, ignoring the pain from the stab wound in his stomach, and bowed. 

Jean looked at his king one last time and said, “Your Highness, it was a pleasure fighting for you.” 

It translated to _ Fuck you _. But only Jean knew that.

King Ichirou nodded once and moved on to speak to a farmer, his way of saying that the matter was done. Jean let two other knights take him away. He couldn’t help but stare at the paintings that covered the halls while he was being dragged outside the castle. After all, it was going to be the last time he got to see them. 

The last thing he saw before getting to the stables was a marble statue of the deceased prince. Riko Moriyama was standing with his hand stretched out, as if motioning the exit of the castle. Though, Jean felt like the prince was reaching out to get ahold of his neck. He didn’t have much time to think about the ghost of fingers pressing against his neck. The two knights threw him onto the floor. 

“Your armor.” They stood there patiently, watching as their former leader took his armor off and reached for his sword. 

Jean closed his eyes and felt the weight of the sword until it grounded him. He reminded himself quietly, “This isn’t the end. Wherever I go, I go alive.” 

He left the armor and sword on the ground. A chill took over his body and he couldn’t help but flinch when the doors to the castle slammed shut. It indicated the end of his life as a Knight of Edgar. Probably as a knight too, for all that he knew. 

Jean counted to ten in his head. Then, to twenty. Then, to thirty. Finally, he ended with fifty. A crash nearby brought him back to reality. He had to get out of Edgar in the next twelve hours, or he’d get killed. The question of where he was going to go came into his head, but he decidedly ignored it and started walking down a random street. Now his one and only option was surviving. No matter how many citizens screamed at him for the murder of “their precious prince”, he would not react. They wouldn’t get the best of him. 

Jean bought a handful of fruits from a stubborn farmer that decided to stay outside. He pointedly ignored the glare sent his way and continued walking until he found a woman selling scarves and coats. He also pointedly ignored her pitiful look. With sufficient equipment to last three days, Jean started his trip to the border. This gave him the opportunity to see that the place he once called home, the place where he was born, was in ruins. The air was full of smoke and not a single ray of sunshine touched the ground. From the hill that he now stood on, Kingdom Edgar looked like a prison. The castle resembled a piece of machinery. Silver, old, pointy, and about to collapse. Jean was about to get to the border, but this last look made him stop and catch his breath. He really was leaving all of this behind. He knew he was leaving with ghosts, ghosts that would follow him forever, but as he caught the first ray of sunshine filter through the clouds, a word came to mind.

A word Jean had never given himself time to think about.

A word he thought may only be a dream.

A word.

_ Freedom. _

The border was intact. There was no sign of destruction in the wall that showed hints of the war that had taken on the kingdom less than a day ago. This, however, didn’t mean the area of the border was spotless in the aftermath. Jean took a second, nothing more, nothing less, to look at the bodies on the ground before walking over to the gates. Wallowing in sorrow was not going to make the deceased come back to life. The ten knights guarding the gate didn’t even spare him a glance. The news of the exile of the former leader of the Prince’s Guard had already reached them by now. Jean wasn’t angry at them for acting indifferent, the knights had been taught to move on with their loses and never hesitate. 

This, however, didn’t stop him from stopping in front of the knights. He took his time looking at each one, not expecting them to look back, and nodded once in farewell. Jean turned around, turned his back to the kingdom, and walked outside the gate. There stood an old man with four carriages lined up behind him. The elderly also had two independent horses near him, sniffing the burned grass. Jean was debating which one to take when a loud cough caught his attention. Besides the old man stood a sickly woman with a baby in her arms. She looked like she was on the verge of collapsing. The small piece of cloth covering the baby certainly wasn’t doing the best in covering them from the cold, as a small cough also came from the baby’s mouth. 

“Excuse me miss,” spoke Jean, successfully catching the attention of the mother, “are you waiting for a carriage?” 

“Not at all young man, I barely have any coins left on me for supper.” 

Jean frowned before asking, “But, do you plan on leaving the kingdom?” 

“If I could, I would,” answered the woman.

Jean did a headcount of how much money he had left and would need to survive the next week. As soon as he finished, he brought out his bag of coins and spoke to the elder man.

“I’d like the two horses please.” 

He paid the man the exact amount and watched as he prepared the horses. Jean brought his attention back to the woman frowning beside him. She looked confused, but Jean could tell by the misty look in her eyes that she was grateful. 

Jean ignored the warm look and said, “I hope you know how to ride.” When he received a nod as an answer, he turned to the horses without another word.

  
  
  


By the time they reached Trojan ground, Jean felt heavy with exhaustion. The last time he’d slept had been around thirty-five hours ago. The last time he’d eaten a full meal had been seventeen hours ago. He’d given up the last bit of fruits he had left to the mother and her son. Even his horse, after a good seven hours of non-stop riding, looked as if he needed a big bucket of water. Jean wouldn’t tell this to anyone, but when he first caught a glance of the gates of Troy, he felt like he could cry out of joy. This joy, however, didn’t reflect in any way on his face, something he had perfected as a knight. That was not the case for the mother. Jean certainly heard a gasp from behind him and what sounded like a prayer. 

Jean understood her reaction. The wall of the Trojan Kingdom was bathed in gold, it’s brightness almost unbearable to the eye of the onlooker. The wall was covered in paintings of gods and goddesses from different religions. From left to right, he saw Greek Goddesses, Roman Gods, Norse Gods, and then it changed to the present, much more prominent religions. What they all had in common was the bright colors and the details in gold. Jean instantly understood why Troy was the first kingdom everyone mentioned when someone talked about art. The wall didn’t look like it was supposed to be there, it looked like it was meant to be inside a museum. Or at least surrounding the Castle of Troy. 

“It’s beautiful,” spoke the woman from where she now stood beside him. Jean silently agreed with her.

They left the horses on the rental stand hiding behind a random tree. It was almost like they purposely placed it there so when people first saw the kingdom, the only thing their eyes would see would be the golden wall. It felt like he’d snapped out of a dream when he saw the knights guarding the gate. The same sense of dread from that morning came back to grab him by the throat. With each step he took closer to them, rock by rock fell into his stomach.

The closest knight spared them a glance before asking, “Where do you come from and what are your intentions?” 

Jean was about to speak but got cut off before he could. 

“We come from Kingdom Edgar. As you know, crisis has fell upon the kingdom and my husband and I have decided to stay with my uncle until further news,” said the woman. Jean stared at her in shock, but didn’t speak up. 

The knight looked at both of them for a long time. It wasn’t until the baby started coughing that he stopped glaring. 

“What’s the surname of your uncle, Mrs?” 

“Valdez.” The knight nodded in recognition and took a step to the side, signaling another knight to open the gate. 

The gates of the kingdom moved until there was enough room for them to enter. The woman thanked the knight quietly and started for the entrance, motioning Jean to follow her. Jean didn't spare the knight a look, he already felt like he wanted to throw up, not from guilt, but from anxiousness. Jean, the mother, and her baby walked far enough for them to close the gates and then even further until the wall was barely in sight. It was then that Jean let himself take in the sight before him.

Troy was nothing like Edgar. In fact, it was the complete opposite. Jean had been to all of the other kingdoms before, but none of them looked alike. Kingdom Edgar looked like a fort always prepared for attack. Kingdom Palmen was known for their ability to take in all of those who needed help, earning themselves the nickname of “The Foster”. And finally, Kingdom Penn was known for being the smallest kingdom of all, but were also known to be stubborn and protective of their own. 

The Kingdom of Troy didn’t remind him of any of the formers. It felt and looked like a fresh breath of air. All the houses were clustered together, as if they were hugging each other, protecting each other. The castle stood in the center, the village surrounding it in a circle. For how big the kingdom was, it certainly looked small with everything so close to each other. But even so, it didn’t look jumbled. On the contrary, the kingdom screamed comfort. Jean didn’t know if it made him uneasy or not. He was starting to get deep into his thoughts when the mother started speaking.

“Pretty neat, isn’t it? I’ve always liked Troy more than the other kingdoms. You’ll find that the people here make up the warmest and most welcoming village.” 

Jean listened to her as he kept looking at the houses from where they stood. They all looked small, and yet he could see groups of people sitting outside the houses, probably chatting about their day. It all looked like a unity. The complete opposite from Edgar, Jean thought to himself again. 

He looked away from the village to look at the green fields filled with harvest and a great amount of flowers. He breathed in the smell of roses to calm himself before asking what had been in his mind for the past hour, “Why did you help me?” 

The woman was currently tapping calming pats on the back of the baby, who was soundly asleep on her shoulder. 

She looked deep in thought, so much that Jean thought she hadn’t heard him. He was about to repeat himself but then she started talking.

“You looked like you were in distress. As soon as we got closer to the gate, I could feel the tension rolling through your shoulders. I figured there was a reason why you didn’t want to talk to the knights and decided on taking the matter of talking into my own hands. Take it as a thank you for the trip here,” she stopped and smiled at him before continuing, “But I really do have an uncle here that could probably spare a bed for you.” 

Even before she had finished her sentence, Jean was already shaking his head, “No, thank you. I have to do this by myself.” 

The woman stood there, gazing at him like he were a mystery, but stopped as soon as Jean started frowning. She nodded and smiled once more before taking a step to the side. 

“Well then, I’ll be on my way. Once again, thank you for bringing me and my son back to a safe place. I hope you find one for yourself soon.” Jean nodded in acknowledgment and the mother started walking away, son still soundly asleep and tucked in her arms. He watched them walk away until they were not far from the village and the sun started setting in the horizon. It was time to search where he would stay for the night. 

Jean took a deep breath, counted until thirty, and started walking toward the golden village. There was still the same word running through his mind as he walked.

_ Freedom. _

  


By the time Jean had reached the village, the sun had already set and people started buzzing around in the streets. It was almost overwhelming, coming from the disaster that had been Kingdom Edgar, to this almost too good to be true piece of land. As Jean set ahead on the lookout for a diner, he looked around the new setting. The chimneys of most of the houses were on, filling the air with the faint smell of smoke. It was unlike the one he had experienced that morning. This smoke reminded him of the last stages of cooking, not of rebel fire intended to destroy civilians. He heard laughter to his left and right. Trojans were known to be joyful, but to see such facial expressions in person brought him back to the dark sense of not fitting in. 

_ Would I be like that if I’d grown up here? _Jean asked himself. Since he was younger he had trained and worked hard to be like those he admired. Knights. He had always wanted to be a knight. To protect others from evil-spirited humans, to be the one in charge of protecting the crown, and to have the privilege of calling himself a leader of the guard. This didn’t leave him much time to do activities that most children do. He was always practicing sparring and researching battle strategies instead of hanging out with the neighborhood kids. 

Watching a kid animatedly talk with an older woman, bright eyes full of innocence and glee, made him asses the sacrifices he made to be where he is right now. Was all the fighting, torture, and grief worth it? Jean would most likely say no, given under different circumstances, but he’s fought hard to be alive. So, yes he would do it again, a hundred times.

Jean saw a stand outside a house from a couple of streets away. Knowing that most diners had stands for fast service outside, he walked up to investigate. Luckily, he was right. The smell of stew made his stomach growl in agony, the hours of not being able to eat catching up to him. He was famished. Jean entered the place and stopped as soon as he did. The place was filled to the brim, merchants eating supper at the tables, and craftsmen drinking beers at the bar. Jean debated on going back outside, but the door was now blocked by a group of people. He approached the bar and silently waited to be attended. As soon as he payed for his order, he tried to once again look for an empty spot. 

Jean was waiting for a woman that was about to stand up to leave when he felt a poke on his shoulder. Startled, but schooling his expression not to seem so, Jean turned to glare at whoever just touched him.

He found himself face to face with an older man. Jean briefly looked at his physical traits: long blond hair, as tall as Jean, muscular ranging to the side of almost too much, and a small smile displayed on his face. He stared at the man with a bored expression, waiting for him to start talking. 

He didn’t have to wait for too long, as the man started talking as soon as he knew he had Jean’s attention.

“You can sit beside me, I’ll scoot over and we’ll both fit,” suggested the man. He then goes on to point at a bench near them that’s clearly empty. Jean looked back at the man, trying to find any sign of bad intentions, but after getting nothing but a waiting look, he nodded and walked over to the bench. 

The man sat down beside him, already done with half of his plate. He waited for Jean to eat his first half before speaking up. 

“My name’s Derek. What’s yours?” Derek asked him. He continued when he was met with silence, “You don’t have to tell me of course.” 

Jean stopped eating and looked at the blond man. He drily answered, “Jean.”

Derek smiled. “Are you new around here Jean?” 

Jean took a gulp of water and nodded. “Just arrived today.” 

“How are you liking the kingdom?” 

Jean hummed in thought before answering, “It’s okay. The people here are… very happy.” 

Derek threw his head back in a laugh and nodded several times. Jean waited until he calmed down to continue eating.

“Yes, Troy’s known to have the most enthusiastic village. I find it charming enough. Wouldn’t be the best thing to fight for civilians that are sad and negative every second,” remarked Derek. Thankfully, he didn’t notice the way Jean froze after his statement. Derek continued, “I’m a knight of the King’s Guard here in Troy. It’s not easy work, but the results always outweigh the sacrifices.” 

Jean continued eating, mentally asking himself what he was going to answer back. As soon as he finished his plate, he told Derek, “I was part of the King’s Guard back in my kingdom too.”

Derek frowned, clearly confused, and asked, “But then, why... are you here?”

Knowing this was going to be asked, Jean had already prepared himself to lie, but for some reason the words didn’t come out of his mouth. 

Instead, he found himself saying, “I got exiled.” 

A sudden silence took over them, the conversation halted to a stop. Jean was staring at his glass of water. There was no way he going to look at the man in the eyes after what he just said.

A cough and a hum later, Derek simply asked, “Did you like being a knight?”

It didn’t take more than a second for Jean to answer him. “Of course.” 

“Then, come with me.” Jean sat straight and turned to look at Derek, disbelief clear in his eyes. Derek faintly smiled at him.

Jean waited for a few seconds, sure that he was being joked at. But Derek didn’t continue talking, he sat there looking at Jean patiently.

“The leader of the King’s Guard will not accept an exiled knight,” he snapped at Derek, mad at the fact that the other even thought that was an option.

The smile in Derek’s face didn’t falter at all. In any case, it seemed to have gotten bigger. 

Jean didn’t expect what the blond man said next. It felt like a stone had dropped in his stomach when Derek said, “Then it’s probably good that I’m the leader of the King’s Guard.” 

Derek didn’t wait for a response and continued, “Reason why I’m telling you again: come be a part of the King’s Guard with me. I have a good feeling about you kid.” 

Jean didn’t hesitate before saying, “This is what I meant by ‘very happy’.” 

Derek laughed and smiled even wider at the look of confusion in Jean’s face. “I’ll take that as a yes,” he said. 

Leaving him without a moment to complain, Derek stood up and motioned Jean to follow him. They left the diner behind, leaving the people to their laughter and drinks. Jean took this time to stare at the back of the knight. Why was this man suddenly being nice to him? What had he said to earn such proposition? It didn’t make sense however hard he thought about it. 

They walked for around thirty minutes when Jean noticed the castle up ahead. His breath caught in his throat. The Castle of Troy was like nothing he’d ever seen before. It had gold details, just like the wall, that shined even in the dark night. The structure and combination of white with the golden elements made it seem like the castle was old and new at the same time. Phrases in what appeared to be Italian were carved into the sides of the windows. The frontal gardens were full with different kinds of flowers, but mainly roses, orchids, and sunflowers. It all looked like it came from a fairytale. The only thing that stood out from the ethereal picture and differentiated it with perfection were the cracks that could be seen on certain parts of the castle, as if to say that it’s fought to stay the way it was today. 

“I hope you like it, because this is where you’ll be staying from now on to whenever you want,” spoke Derek. Jean stared at him and hoped Derek could see how grateful he was, even though he knew how dangerous it would be for him to be part of the King’s Guard. 

Derek acknowledged his stare with a smile, “Don’t get too happy. Training starts tomorrow at 6 a.m. sharp.” 

Jean nodded and Derek continued his walk to speak with the knights guarding the entrance. Jean waited near him until he finished, looking back up to awe at the castle. He had never seen so much beauty contained into one single thing, and he was going to stay there. A shiver went down his spine and Jean fought back the excitement that was about to take over him, a feeling he hadn’t gotten in the last five years of his life. It all felt like a dream. He was almost sure he was going to wake up and Riko would be choking him awake, a bucket of water in his other hand. A call of his name brought him back to reality, Derek frowning at his tense pose from the entrance. 

Jean took a deep breath. Now was not the time to duel on the past, his past less of all. He’d promised to leave it all behind. Jean walked up to Derek and the guards, bowing his head in greeting. He followed Derek and crossed the small bridge between the gate and the entrance. A small river flowed below it, fish scales glowing in the moonlight. They reached the entrance and the guards opened it without a word. Jean looked at Derek’s back as he passed by them, head held high but with a friendly smile accompanying it. The complete opposite of him, mused Jean to himself. Jean greeted those at the entrance and then followed the leader of the guard inside. It was as beautiful as the outside. Regal paintings spread out on the hallways, vases filled with flowers from the garden located near them, and golden chandeliers came from the tall ceilings. 

Their surroundings completely changed as they entered another room. A sitting area for visitors to wait for news from the King. Velvet, red couches and a lit fireplace made it feel like a place made to comfort people in case they got bad news instead of good ones. They continued on and crossed a small intersection that divided the castle in two. Jean hummed to himself. They were now going to enter the section meant for the servants, knights, cooks, and maids. 

It was not what Jean expected at all. Back at Edgar, this part of the castle looked like a gray mess of an old building. The decors were barely there at all. It felt like they were all confined in their own small prison.

This was not that at all. The Castle of Troy continued on with its beautiful walls. Now, instead of paintings, clocks, maps, and kitchen books decorated the halls. A huge bookshelf started at the entrance of the section and ended fifty feet away. The ceiling was completely different though. Instead of pricey chandeliers, it was manually painted on. Angels and gods were painted randomly, but they all reached out to each other in the blue sky. Jean heard a cough and snapped his gaze away from the beauty, too caught up in it to notice Derek stopping beside a large, clear door. Jean sneaked a peek inside and saw the royal kitchen. The cooks were putting away the scraps of supper and cleaning at the marble tabletops. Derek continued on. They reached what Jean was sure was the side of the knights’ dormitories. He apparently was right, because Derek stopped at the last door and waited for him to catch up. Derek took a huge set of keys out of his pocket and unlocked the door. Jean found himself with a normal-sized room. A desk was at the end of the room, a bed right beside it, and then a wardrobe. 

Jean turned to look back at Derek and said, “I don’t know how to thank you.”

Derek raised his eyebrows in what looked like surprise. He then smiled and answered, “You’re already thanking me by being here. I already told the guards to speak with the maids and fix you a proper amount of clothing. Now go to sleep, I can feel your restlessness from here. Remember to wake up for training.” 

He did not wait for Jean’s answer and walked back to where they came from. Jean saw him enter the first door on the hallway and waited to hear the sound of a lock before releasing a shudder. He looked back at the room. The place that was going to be his home for the next days. It felt like he was making a grand decision when he first stepped inside the room, locking the door behind him. It felt like he was making the first important decision of this new life. He stood frozen on his feet, his back to the door, and his chest moving up and down from his heaving. He willed himself to calm down and approached the bed. Jean carefully moved the pack of clothing from the bed to the desk. After that, he moved the duvet away and kicked his shoes off. A long sigh came out of his mouth as soon as his back touched the soft silk. Jean pulled the duvet on top of himself and snuggled closer to the wall. His mind was foggy with sleep already, and yet that same word appeared before he lost consciousness.

_ Freedom _.

  


A ray of sunlight woke him. The clock hanging on the wall beside his wardrobe showed that it was five in the morning. Jean groaned to himself. He had woken up two times from the same nightmare. A man in his tomb, royal hands wrapped around Jean’s neck, a bucket of water, and a sword slashing through his chest. He lay there panting for some minutes, eyes wide open. The sunlight from the window caught his attention. He sat up and looked outside at the garden. Birds were chirping around the multiple trees and the flowers glowed in the sun. It was like a saturated dream. Jean let himself appreciate the scenery. This was the first of his new life.

It took Jean approximately ten minutes to find the washroom. He quickly washed himself in a shower cubicle and then got ready for the day. He wore the most comfortable option of the trousers that had been given to him yesterday and a v-neck. It took him another ten minutes to find the kitchen. The cooks greeted him cheerily and one pointed at an empty seat in a large table already full of other knights. They all looked up at him and he nodded in greeting, in turn receiving a good set of smiles and two or three scowls. The scowls calmed him down a bit, he was about to feel uneasy with all the smiles. 

Jean finished his breakfast in record time and waited for the others to do so as well. All the other knights got up together and one signaled Jean to come with. Jean followed them into the garden and then into the land saved for training. The training center resembled amphitheaters from Ancient Rome, just with less seats and a bigger platform. It was clear that this was built with The Tournament in mind. The image brought Jean a memory of his first tournament, in which he replaced the wounded knight of Edgar and won against the representative knight of Palmen. He had won Edgar the title of the capital last year. Now there was currently no capital as a consequence of the Blood War between Kingdom Edgar and Kingdom Penn.

He distinctly heard Derek shouting in the background and snapped himself out of the memory. Jean walked up to the circle formed around the former knight. 

“Good morning everyone. I suppose you’ve all met our new addition,” Derek looked at Jean and waited for all the knights to nod before continuing, “Jean. Today we’ll be sparring in partners. I’ll be yours, but don’t worry, I’ll go easy on you.” 

Derek smiled widely at him. Jean didn’t have to look at the other knights to know they were staring at him with dread, or pity. Derek was, in fact, not going to go easy on him. 

The knights went to the large, concealed room located in the back of the field. They changed into their armors and went back outside to meet their leader. Jean shuffled the mail shirt underneath his armor. A little loose, but nothing that he couldn’t handle. The knights broke up into pairs, leaving him in the middle of the stadium with Derek. Jean took a deep breath and ignored the kind smile on Derek’s face. They unsheathed their swords and started sparring. Jean took personal satisfaction at the way the smile fell from Derek’s face five minutes into the duel. The next twenty minutes went by in a flash of metal and grunts. The older knight had his jaw clenched in exhaustion, but still perfectly blocked all of Jean’s advances. By the time Derek got Jean disarmed, there had successfully passed thirty minutes without a defeat. 

Jean sat on the floor, almost completely out of breath but reeling with adrenaline. He could feel Derek staring down at him from where he stood. It took some seconds for Jean to realize there wasn’t the sound of swords clashing anymore, meaning that the other knights had stopped to stare too. Jean stood up, waiting for the worst. What he didn’t expect was a hand grabbing his shoulder and a giant, proud smile being directed at him. 

“Well, that was fucking amazing!” Jean stood frozen, a confused frown on his face, but Derek kept talking, “You, sir, are the first knight to ever get past ten minutes of sparring with me! Without being disarmed a single time, might I add. Great job, Jean.”

A silence took over the amphitheater and Jean turned to look at the other knights. They were all staring at him in wonder, as if he were a creature from another dimension. Even those who had scowled at him before appeared astonished. The one in the furthermost left gave him a thumbs up and Jean’s frown deepened. 

The hand in his shoulder shook him to grab his attention.

“How about round two?” Derek asked cheerily. The other knights went back to sparring without a second thought and Jean found himself obligated to say yes. 

They were in for around five minutes of sparring when something caught Derek’s attention and Jean successfully disarmed him. Jean frowned at his sudden distraction and was about to ask if he was okay when he caught sight of golden hair. 

Jean stared in a daze at the figure walking up to the platform. Golden hair, golden eyes, and a golden smile. Prince Jeremy Knox of Troy. First in line for the throne. 

Prince Jeremy smiled at the knights as he walked past them, clearly en route to speak to the leader of the King’s Guard. That, however, didn’t stop him from greeting each knight after they bowed at him. As he got closer, Jean felt an elbow pressing into his side and remembered that he should be bowing at the prince too. He lowered his chest and stared at his shoes, trying not to stare at the sleek, white pair that appeared in front of him. 

“Good morning,” greeted the prince. Jean felt a shiver down his spine and stood back up. His eyes, like a magnet, found Prince Jeremy’s brown ones right away. 

_ Oh _. Jean gulped and schooled his expression into a calm one. He bowed again, only his head this time, and said, “Your Highness.” 

Prince Jeremy smiled at him softly and proceeded to look at him up and down. Jean willed himself not to make any assumptions, knowing the prince was most likely trying to find the reason he was chosen to be part of the guard.

“Jean Moreau, right? Derek already told me about you. What he didn’t tell me was that you were an exceptionally skilled fighter,” said the prince. Jean felt himself warm at the compliment, but kept his calm façade and bowed his head to show gratitude.

He looked back at the prince, slightly confused as to why he still stood there. It was certain that he was here for the leader of the knights, not him. Prince Jeremy suddenly took a step closer and Jean straightened with a start. From his position, he could see the freckles littering the prince’s rosy cheeks and the way his hair slightly curled at the tips. 

“Allow me to ask you to lead my guard.” 

The words that came out of the prince’s mouth made his process of admiration stop completely. In fact, Jean could distinctly place the feeling of coldness that took over his body. He stared at the earnest honey eyes in silence. Jean knew the coldness had spread to his gaze when Jeremy started frowning.

Jean turned to face Derek, who looked back at him sadly, like he knew exactly what was going through Jean’s mind. “May I excuse myself?” 

Derek straightened up and nodded. Jean looked back the prince and bid him farewell with a whisper of “Your Highness.”

Jean didn’t wait to hear an answer and walked past the prince and the guard, who were mumbling between themselves about what they’ve just witnessed. He kept walking until he reached the middle of the garden. Now certain that he was out of sight from the training deck, Jean fell to his knees and started dry-heaving. Images of Riko crossed his mind and filled his brain with monstrous thoughts. Jean stood up after some seconds, demanding his weak knees to at least get him to his room. It didn’t matter anyway. The memories had already entered his mind and wouldn’t leave him alone for the rest of the day.

Jean thought back to the beautiful smile of the prince, but then soon recoiled. He imagined the words Riko always told him coming out of Prince Jeremy’s mouth. A golden angel perversely saying “You’ll always be mine” repeatedly. He reached his room and pressed his face down on his bed.

Jean clutched his pillow and whispered to himself, “You’re not with him anymore. Not anymore. Not anymore.”

  
  
  
  


Three days. It had been three days since Jean had met the prince. Even as he sparred and trained heavily, the words repeated themselves in his mind over and over again. There was also the small fact that Jean couldn’t get the prince’s face out of his mind, but he didn’t have time to dwell on that. The past three days were filled with hardcore training and horseback riding. It’s not like this is something new for Jean, but after the long day of being tortured in Edgar’s prison and his trip to Troy, his body felt as sore as it could be. Derek always told him that he could take a break whenever he wanted to, but Jean always refused. He liked the burn in his muscles that reminded him of all the work he had accomplished that day. Derek didn’t understand him, of course, but left him alone to his battle rope workout.

By the time Jean had finished for the day, everyone had gone to rest. He sat in a bench that overlooked the river and the houses surrounding the castle. For all that he complained of the voices in his head, the castle calmed him down whenever his anxiety got too strong. He didn’t know if it was the birds chirping, the smell of flowers, or the sound of water flowing through the stream. This had become his favorite part of the day: sitting down on the bench and letting the silence hug him. 

An unknown smell hit his nose. Similar to that of a rose, but with a brightness Jean considered could either be strawberries or raspberries. Interested in the sweet scent, he turned around to search from where it came from, but instead found himself face-to-face with the prince. 

Prince Jeremy quirked a barely there smile and pointed at the empty place in the bench. “May I sit there?” 

Jean nodded instantly. He was not about to refuse a request from a royal person, whether he hated them or not. The prince sat down beside him. Jean felt their shoulders brush and tried to swiftly make some space between them. His nose was now full of the sweet scent, and although in other circumstances it would’ve overwhelmed him, Jean found himself calming down at the aroma. They sat there in silence and watched a group of kids playing on the street near the bridge. 

“I apologize if my question took you off guard,” began the prince, “but I won’t take back my request. I still stand by what I said.”

Jean continued watching the kids play around with a ball made of red yarn. The only indication he gave the prince that he had heard him was a small hum of acknowledgement. He collected his thoughts and turned to look at the prince, only to find him already staring at him. Jean watched as the rosy cheeks became even redder. It reached his ears and cheekbones, which were also littered with freckles. Jean went back to look at his eyes and made himself stare right at honey while he spoke. 

“Your Highness, you met me days ago. How could you request such matter of importance from a person you’ve only spoken to once?”

“Call it intuition.” Prince Jeremy shrugged. “But if barely knowing me is what’s keeping you from accepting my request, go ahead and ask me some questions.”

“Questions?” Jean asked. This was not what he had expected to receive as an answer.

“Yes. I’d also prefer to know more about my future leader of guard. So, ask away.” Jean watched as the smile on the prince’s face gradually got bigger. Almost like he found his confusion endearing.

The smile fell as soon as he heard Jean’s question: “What’s your favorite color?”

“Really? You really chose the most basic question of all.” The prince stared at him incredulously, disappointment pouring from his displeased expression.

The prince sighed and answered, “Yellow and red. Cliché I know, but after living with those colors since you’re a kid, you learn to love them.” 

He threw the question back and Jean hummed before simply saying, “Blue.” 

It went like that for awhile. Jean stored all the new information he had of the prince in his mind: he liked both cats and dogs, he loved to read, his favorite activity consisted of horseback riding and practicing with his bow and arrow, his favorite flower was the sunflower, and his favorite food was rustic bread with cheese and strawberry spread.

Jean shortly answered all the questions back: he preferred cats, he enjoyed writing and sparring, he didn’t have a favorite flower (a lie), and his favorite food was French stew. 

Prince Jeremy grinned at him. “See? Now we know each other better and you’ve got nothing to fear. Of course you have all the time you need to think about it but-”

“I’ll do it,” Jean cut him off. 

The prince’s mouth fell slightly in surprise. Jean decidedly stared at the houses instead of him, nerves on end. He was comparing the roofs’ colors when the prince spoke again.

“You’ll do it? You’ll be my future leader of the King’s Guard?” Jean nodded slowly, but he completely ignored the loud, relieved sigh that came from the prince. 

“My duty is to protect you anyway. It’s not like much will change,” pointed out Jean boredly. He knew that was not the case at all, but still wanted to hear what the prince had to say.

“Some things will change but not much. I’ll tell you from now, though, that I’d prefer if you didn’t use formalities with me when it’s just the two of us.” 

Jean knew his facial expression had to show how surprised he was. He’d always been taught as a kid to use formalities with the royal families, no matter the situation. To hear a prince, one who was rumored to become king in months, request this felt almost like a test. 

“What would you like me to call you, then?” He asked the prince. 

The prince laughed softly before saying, “Jeremy, of course.”

Jean nodded, ignoring the warmth in his chest after hearing that laugh, and said, “Alright… Jeremy.” 

Jeremy’s smile widened and the full-on blush came back. The sun had started to set, and it made the prince’s brown hair and eyes glow a golden honey in the sunlight. Jean felt enthralled, as if he were watching the making of one of the big paintings that hung on the castle walls. The prince wasn’t bothered by his staring, it appeared, because his smile only softened and he didn’t look away. The rosyness of his cheeks was only highlighted by the orange tones in the sky. His hair, a strange combination between straight and wavy, appeared almost translucent. Jeremy looked like he belonged in the wall with the other gods. 

Jean cleared his throat and finally looked away, but the warmth was still there, covering his whole body in flames. He felt the stare from the prince but knew that if he turned to look back at him again, he wasn’t going to be capable of standing up. Jean felt like he wanted to write poems focused on gold. 

“I’ll see you tomorrow, then. Have a nice evening, Jean.” The words were softly spoken, like Jeremy was trying not to break a moment. The prince stood up and started walking away. 

Before he got out of earshot, Jean spoke up. “You too, Jeremy.” The footsteps stopped momentarily, but Jean didn’t look at him to see his expression. He waited until he heard the telltale sound of the prince’s footsteps, and let out a long breath. This time, the word that stuck in his head wasn’t that of a free man, but of one longing to hold a treasure.

_ Gold _.

  


The jitters. Jean had to have the jitters. He was incapable of standing straight or laying down for the whole morning. The training session was a whole other thing. Derek had called him out at least five times for his distraction. It was the first time another person had almost won in sparring against him. Competitive as he is, Jean stood his ground and fought back the other knights in quick succession, defeating them all one after the other. It was then that Derek seemed pleased and stopped scolding him. 

He had no idea why he was acting this way. Or well, maybe he had an idea why. The past night had been full of overthinking and analyzing his conversation with Jeremy. There were also moments in which Jean sat on his bed for long minutes, mind far away in a field of golden curls and sweet smiles. A personification of sunshine was a problem if Jean had ever seen one. Jean knew what he was getting into, but nothing would make him take his words back. He didn’t regret agreeing to the new job, so then why was he so nervous about talking to the prince again? 

Jean went into the kitchen in search for a snack. He greeted the cooks and waited for one of them to finish their task. As soon as an older woman stopped washing dishes, she brought him an apple and gave him a motherly smile. Jean muttered a fast thank you and left the kitchens to go to the stables. Surprisingly, he had become a bit attached to the horse he was assigned for riding practice. Only a week and this was already happening, he had to get his mind straight. That thought didn’t stop him from his walk to the stables, though. 

A certain white mane came into view and Jean smiled to himself. The horse had grown on him a lot. The first day with him had been total chaos, having been introduced and then gone right to a riding competition, it ended as a complete mess. After learning the horse’s name, Pegasus, named by the prince of course, Jean promised himself to get along with the fast animal. Derek had said that they both had a lot in common, mainly their stubbornness and mood swings. That had earned him a scowl from Jean and a loud snort from Pegasus. That had been their bonding moment, if Jean had to choose one. There was also the time when the thoughts in Jean’s head got too loud and he spent the whole afternoon cleaning the horse. It ended in Jean drenched from top to bottom, but Pegasus shined and licked his cheek, so yes, a pivotal moment for both of them. 

Jean knocked on the door of the stall and waited for Pegasus to stick his whole head out. As soon as the horse saw it was him, he leaned in to lick his left cheek and nudge their heads together. Jean laughed and moved Pegasus’s head away from him. He presented the apple to the horse and snorted when Pegasus ate the whole fruit in two bites. So maybe they did have things in common. He was scratching the horse’s head when suddenly Pegasus started neighing and pushing his face towards the pathway earnestly. Jean turned around to see what made Pegasus get so excited. There, leaving another horse inside the biggest stall, was Jeremy Knox. There was an obnoxiously big smile on his face as he cooed at the horse and pet her mane before closing the stall door. So maybe Pegasus and Jean had many things in common. 

Jeremy started to walk, looking like he was about to leave the stalls, when their eyes caught. Jean’s hand stopped brushing through Pegasus’s hair, frozen and waiting for the prince to say something, anything. Jeremy smiled at him and walked closer to scratch Pegasus behind his ear. The neigh that came from the horse sounded much softer, like the equivalent of a purr from a cat. 

“He’s a beauty, isn’t he?” Jeremy said, focused on the task of petting the horse. Jean released a sigh and dropped his hand from the horse’s mane. He leaned onto the stall door and kept looking at Jeremy. His curls were much more prominent today, probably from sweating after the afternoon ride. The sun had left his nose a bright red, which was slowly spreading to his cheeks. All the restlessness had gone out of Jean’s body like magic. For a second, it felt like he had never been nervous since the beginning. 

Jean saw a small bead of sweat run down the side of Jeremy’s face and couldn’t stop the words coming out of his mouth. “Yes. Yes, he is.” He looked away before Jeremy caught him staring, but he had a feeling he was too late. 

Pegasus snorted beside him. The damn horse was going to get under his skin. Jean glared at the animal and waited for the prince to say something. Jeremy acted like he didn’t hear anything, but he stopped petting the horse in favor to put all his attention on Jean. 

“First day of your new job, how are you feeling?” Jeremy asked him. 

Jean regarded him with a raised eyebrow, “It’s the first time I see you today, I don’t think I’ve started my new job.” 

Jeremy laughed and shook his head. “It starts now, then. Come with me, I have to show you where we’ll pass most of the time for the next months.”

They left the stalls after saying goodbye to Pegasus. The horse nudged both of their faces together, which left them with little to no space between their cheeks and had Jean’s heart skipping a beat. Jeremy had only laughed at the actions of the horse. The birds in the garden chirped and flew towards Jeremy, as if he were calling them in. Two wrens dropped in each of Jean’s shoulders. Jeremy giggled at the sight and Jean backtracked his initial thought of swatting them away. They entered the castle, wrens now gone, and headed towards the royal hall. Jean had never even crossed this part of the castle besides the day he first got here. The walls were completely decorated in gold with red accents. Everything looked regal. From the paintings, to the vases, to the person walking beside him. 

There were paintings of the royal family hanging on almost every wall. The same brown hair, shining smile, and calm posture. An almost perfect family, if Jean had ever seen one. He compared the Jeremy from the paintings to one walking beside him. Things had definitely changed and it was apparent. The shine in Jeremy’s eyes had subdued a little, not from disappointment or sadness, but of that which comes with maturity. His hair was also longer and left without gel, unlike the paintings. He now had the air of a king, not of a prince. Jean didn’t say any of this out loud, it felt like something he had to keep to himself for now. 

They stopped in front of a red door with a golden name plate, which read _ Strategy Room III. _Jeremy turned the gold doorknob and let them into, fittingly so, battle. A long table filled with papers, nibs dripping with ink, and a miniature-sized model of the kingdom made up half of the room. At the end of the table stood a woman, someone Jean had never seen before in his stay there. Said woman looked to be in a debacle, haphazardly throwing papers behind her back and writing down at high-speed in the new sheets.

“Alvarez, you’re going to sprain your wrist writing that fast,” spoke Jeremy. The woman, Alvarez, snapped her neck up at the sound of Jeremy’s voice and stared at them in shock. She looked at Jeremy once before starting a stare match with Jean, who frowned to himself but didn’t back down. They both decidedly ignored the continuous coughs coming from the prince and carried on with their activity. Alvarez, as if settled by what she saw in his eyes, changed her stoic expression into a big smile. 

“I presume you’re Moreau? Or would you prefer for me to call you by your first name?” Her grin seemed to get bigger, almost in the verge of mocking, but not so. 

Jean glanced at Jeremy before giving his answer. “Moreau is fine. I suppose you’re the prince’s right hand woman?”

Alvarez’s grin now looked like it was about to reach her ears. “The one and only. But I also like the term ‘side bitch’ as well.” 

“Alvarez!” Jeremy chided across the room. Jean held back a snort and patiently waited until they stopped the theatrics. Alvarez had taken Jeremy into a headlock and was now ruffling his hair as if he were a dog.

It took him a few minutes to get her off, but Jeremy finally freed himself and looked at Jean with a shaky smile. His ears were red and he was panting from the exchange with Alvarez. Jean looked back at the busy woman. 

“Do you need any help organizing those papers back there?” He pointed at the corner of the table, where a tall stack of papers looked in the verge of collapsing. 

“Oh no, that’s not important. That’s just details and accommodations of the Royal Ball. I have days to spare to fix that.” Jean nodded, there was no use asking a second time when she had already changed her center of attention to another stack of papers. 

Jeremy had finally put himself back together. “Alvarez, tell Jean a bit of what we do around here.”

That was mostly what the entire evening had focused on: Alvarez guiding Jean through the events they had planned throughout the year and their need of a new battle plan. The whole while, Jeremy had stood on the side, listening to their conversations but not making any comments. Jean had found it weird and disconcerting at first, but then he understood that the prince simply wanted him to work at his own pace and in his own way. Jean didn’t have the heart to tell Jeremy that if he were to make the battle plan with the approach he was taught, half of the knights would end up dead. Jean decided to use a more peaceful battle plan to show Alvarez, who appeared to be impressed at his knowledge of combat.

The only comment that Jeremy _ did _ make was this: “If you were painted as a god or goddess of Greek mythology you would be Athena.” It was as much of compliment as a random sentence. 

Jean had answered back in a second, “And you would be Apollo.”

Alvarez watched the exchange with a mischievous smile and a glint in her eyes. Jean decidedly ignored her and continued talking about positions and probability of attack. As he did, though, he thought about how she would probably be Hades.

The next day went around the same routine. As did the next week, and then suddenly a month. Today, November 27th, would mark the first month of Jean in the palace. He spent the day watching the tree leaves fall and scatter around the royal garden. There was tension on his shoulders from how he had spent the last two days, sparring and training himself into oblivion. November 25th had been the anniversary of the first month since Prince Riko Moriyama had died. Word had quickly moved throughout the castle, reaching the knights early in the morning and making it their topic of conversation in breakfast. They had all stopped and stared at Jean when he entered the kitchen, but continued on with the topic when Jean barely gave them a glance of acknowledgement. The same had happened with Jeremy and Alvarez. Both had stared at him when he entered the reunion room, but with a nod from Jean continued on with speculating what happened that day in October. What had made the prince go crazy?

Jean knew. Of course, he knew. Yet he chose to stay quiet and listen in on their conversation. Or at least he tried to appear like that. His thoughts were filled with flashbacks for the entire day and the only thing that made him snap out of it was Jeremy’s hand on his shoulder when he said goodbye. It was clear as day that Jeremy knew what he was going through, Derek probably told him of the reason why he came to Troy. He hadn’t bothered to say anything about it and instead gave him a small smile and left for his chambers. Jean had appreciated that. He didn’t know what rude words were capable of coming out of his mouth if Jeremy made him talk. 

Yesterday had been the same. The ghoul of fingers still covered Jean’s body like a cloak. The thought of drinking water made him retch. Any pointed objects besides his sword made him shudder. By now, there were shadows under his eyes and his throat was the driest it had ever been. As he sat down on his chosen bench of the garden, he thought back to his month in the castle. He should be nothing but grateful to still be alive and staying here in this magnificent place. But he can’t bring himself to feel anything apart from tired. 

He feels more than sees Jeremy’s sudden presence beside him. The prince halts for a second before sitting down next to him. Jean doesn’t greet him nor looks at him, but his thoughts have left him to be replaced with finding out what Jeremy’s scent reminds him of. Jeremy, as if knowing his thought process had changed into something else, starts talking.

“You look like the physical description of death.” 

Jean snorted without feeling. “Isn’t that a nice thing to hear?” Jean didn’t have to look at Jeremy to know he was furrowing his brows.

The prince continued, “I have no idea what you’re going through, so I’m not going to comment on the matter. Yet, I don’t believe it rightful for you to take it out on yourself. Jean, look at me, please.”

At that last sentence, Jean felt his jaw crack under pressure. He breathed in six times before making himself turn to look at the prince in the eyes. What he saw broke him, if anything. Jeremy looked like he was feeling the pain Jean had in the last two days. His eyes, which always appeared to be consumed in sunshine, were sullen with empathy and sadness. They went wide when their gazes connected and a gasp fell out of the prince’s mouth.

Jeremy reached out, softly cupping Jean’s jaw. It felt like the first bit of warmth had hit him in days. “Jean…”

Jean sighed deeply against Jeremy’s hand and closed his eyes, not wanting to see the expression on the prince’s face. Seconds, minutes maybe, passed by with Jean breathing in the scent of sunlight. The hand on Jean’s face started to move. His chest felt like a thunderstorm. The first ray of sunshine was the thumb softly stroking his cheek. The rainbow was the hum Jeremy did when Jean leaned into his hand. 

Was this what Icarus felt when he reached for the sun? This exhilarating feeling that took over one’s body? Until anything they felt was simply _ warmth, warmth, warmth. _ Jean felt like he was soaring, if only for a second. His world settled. His thought process ended and started on the same point: Jeremy. 

He finally opened his eyes to look at the prince. He only hoped the tumultuous feelings he was having didn’t show on his face. Jeremy had also settled from the sadness it seemed, as he now looked calm and wore a barely-there smile. Jean’s world also started and finished there, on the right and left dimples on Jeremy’s cheeks. He was about to say something, anything, to the prince when he noticed Jeremy’s eyes tracking down something through Jean’s face, and then his thumb swiftly moved to wipe it away. It had been a tear.

“You might just be the strongest person I’ve ever known,” whispered Jeremy. There were no more tears apart from the one, but Jean felt the wet patch like a tattoo on his skin. 

Taking the prince’s hand from his cheek, Jean pulled it down, but didn’t let go instantly. When he did, it felt like a crash. Icarus falling into the sea. The birds were chirping around them, always companions to the various events in Jean’s life. Jeremy was staring at him, as he always seemed to be these days. 

“I apologize for my behavior this past few days. I know I haven’t been of much help.” His throat was sore and it hurt to even speak. Jeremy’s hard expression hurt him double the much.

“Don’t you ever dare apologize to me again. Not now, not ever. And if I have to make you kneel and promise me that, I will.” 

Jean nodded once and cleared his throat, looking past the prince to watch the kids playing in the streets. 

“Here,” spoke the prince. Jean furrowed his brows, he hadn’t expected for the prince to talk again. He turned to look at what he meant and found himself facing a glass of water. It was tinted a dark yellow and from the outside appeared to be melted gold. Jean gulped and looked back at Jeremy, who patiently waited for his attention. 

“I thought if it was disguised as another thing from the outside, maybe it wouldn’t be as difficult to drink.” Jeremy finished his sentence with a shrug, appearing to be nonchalant, but his tight grip on the glass showed just how scared of Jean’s response he was. ‘Had he done the right thing?’ was something Jeremy was probably asking himself. 

Jean took the glass from him, looked up to the sky, and drank away. It was unsettling at first, the water almost didn’t make it past his throat, but he eventually finished. Jeremy almost looked proud, his normal grin now shining back at him. Jean placed the glass down on the bench and silently moved back to watch the kids. A red string made of yarn was now placed on the street floor, covering a length of at least six houses. A small group of boys were tying the red ball of yarn around a single boy. They finished it off with a knot at the top. Jeremy laughed softly at their antics. Another one of the boys pulled a string until the boy went free and hugged him. Jean quirked a faint smile at the scene.

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen that expression on your face before.” Jean startled and looked at Jeremy, who chuckled at his reaction. 

“What do you mean?” 

“Well, I only ever see you with two expressions: blankness or softness.” The prince smiled as he finished, as if he had just unfolded a secret.

Jean frowned. “When do I ever look soft?” 

Jeremy’s smile dimpled. “Whenever you look at me.” 

A beat. A breath. A bird chirp. Jean scoffed and looked away. He knew he was blushing because of the amount of warmth he felt on his cheeks. The sunlight didn’t help him at all. He willed himself to calm down. 

“Thank you,” Jean said faintly. _ For everything, _he didn’t say. He didn’t need to though, he was pretty sure Jeremy knew what he meant. The prince didn’t answer, but instead moved closer to him, until their legs touched. Jean looked up at the sky again. His heart settled. 

  


January 15th. The sunny Kingdom of Troy was battling the strong cold winds with light rays of sunlight. Jean still couldn’t comprehend how the weather worked in this kingdom. By now, the Kingdom of Edgar would be filled to the brim with snow, granite, and not a single ray of sunshine would paint the sky. Jean turned to tell Jeremy just that, but found himself unable to disrupt the tranquil state of the prince. Jeremy had his eyes closed with a barely there quirk to his lips. The cool breeze ruffled his curls and reddened his nose. Jean felt his heartbeat quicken, yet didn’t react to the change. These days, it seemed to always happen around the prince. Jean would stare and stare and stare until his heartbeat resembled the finish of a sparring match. The sun, though faint, seemed to follow him everywhere. It enhanced the freckles on his cheeks, his golden eyelashes, and the currently-hidden brown eyes that lit up every room he walked in. 

Jeremy, as if hearing the turmoil going on his head, opened his eyes and looked at him. Jean shivered, because of the cold or having the attention of the prince, he didn’t know. Perhaps the latter, if he chose to acknowledge it. 

The prince had once said that he thought Jean was the strongest person he knew, and Jean thought the same of him. The past few days around the castle had been an utter chaos. The king had finally admitted to stepping down of the throne to focus on his health. Everyone went to talk to Jeremy about this or that. Jean, as the designated knight of the prince, followed him everywhere and had to see as slowly, little by little, Jeremy started to tire. Just yesterday everyone had decided to leave the prince alone, simply because the king had said so. People still came to talk to him about minor matters, but not more than two a day. 

Jean waited for the prince to say something, but he never did. He simply stood there, smiling and looking up at him. 

Jean cleared his throat. “Do I have something on my face, Your Highness?” He added the title at the end, as maids and cooks walked past them to enter the kitchen from the back door. 

The prince shook his head, but his face was full of mischief. Jeremy started laughing at his confused face and took a step back. Jean looked down and caught sight of a rope just as Jeremy tripped on it. He quickly stepped forward, ignored the gasp that fell from the prince’s mouth, and held him in his arms to stop the fall. Jeremy’s hands grasped his shoulders for stability and Jean supported him by placing his hands on the prince’s waist. Jean heard another gasp, but decided to focus on kicking the rope away from the middle of the garden. As soon as he finished, he turned to ask the prince if he was okay, but stopped abruptly.

Warmth. Jeremy’s eyelashes brushing against his cheek made him feel warm. The body pressed against him, without a single place to spare, left him warm. The wide, golden eyes staring up at him made him feel even warmer. Jean was sure that he must be blushing from head to toe, but he didn’t dare move from their position. Jeremy’s nose bumped against his and Jean took hold of his breath. 

The hands on his shoulders seemed to tighten, yet the prince kept his stare unmoving. There wasn’t a smile on his face anymore, just pure shock and a gaping mouth. Jean glanced at the rosy lips once, then twice, and shifted on his feet. He felt like he was going to explode. All the emotions pent up since months ago would be coming out of their cage and Jeremy wouldn’t be spared of watching him crumble, crumble at his own feet from the way the prince made him feel. 

Before any of that could happen, the prince took a step back and lowered his hands from Jean’s shoulders. Jean’s own hands left the prince’s waist, too slow to pass as a mistake, but not enough to bring up questions. 

Warmth was the ghost of Jeremy’s hands on his shoulders, the ghost of eyelashes against his cheek and the ghost of a nose moving against his own. 

“Excuse me for my clumsiness. That will not happen again,” said Jeremy. He wasn’t looking at Jean, instead choosing to look anywhere else.

Jean felt something inside him flicker out, but stubbornly answered the prince, “Yet if it did, I would catch you again. I’ll always catch you when you fall.” Jeremy’s eyes widened again and finally looked back at the knight. 

Jeremy sighed an unsteady breath and shook his head again. Jean was about to speak again, to make the prince understand that he wasn’t lying, but the prince spoke up first. 

“Your eyes, yet cold and gray as the haze of a winter morning, are a splendor to look at up close.”

The comment took Jean completely off guard, but before he could say anything at all, Jeremy smiled and walked off into the kitchen. Jean followed, as it was his duty, but he felt as unstable on his feet as did Jeremy’s smile. 

They went into the hallway and reached the reunion room, where they found Laila and Alvarez chatting about spring tournaments. They greeted the women and sat down in opposite sides of the table. Jean instantly took notice of how Jeremy wouldn’t look him in the eye. Laila and Alvarez, if they noticed the tension between them, didn’t mention anything and started to talk about the events of the next two months: the ball and the coronation. 

Jeremy instantly lit up at the mention of the ball. He’d been planning it with Alvarez for months now and every time they mentioned it when they got together, he would turn into a spitfire of ideas. Jean sat back and watched them talk, once again, of the royal ball and what it would entail.

“I know you don’t want to talk about this, but your father will expect you to find a partner by the end of the ball.” Alvarez pointed out and before her sentence was even finished, Jeremy wore a grimace on his face.

The prince sighed. “I already promised to dance with all those who come up to me. I won’t get ahead of myself and promise you that. Please, do not ask such thing if you know I won’t do it.”

Alvarez didn’t look appeased by the prince’s decision but respected his request and moved on to another topic. 

Jean didn’t though. His mind was now filled with images of Jeremy dancing with princesses, princes, merchants, and probably the entirety of Troy. Unthinkingly, his jaw clenched, as did his hands in his lap. If only he had the courage, he would ask Jeremy to the ball. But what for? His duty is to protect the man, not to dance with him. Jean glanced up just in time to catch Jeremy’s gaze on him. Jeremy looked away swiftly and stared at Laila as she talked. Jean kept his gaze level on the prince. How could he ever stand a chance anyway? Jeremy is gorgeous, known to be described as one of the most handsome men in the four kingdoms. He is Troy’s proudest achievement and loved by all the inhabitants of the domain. An unreachable star, Jean would dare call him. No one could ever deserve as good as a person as Jeremy Knox. 

The word that caught his attention again was, unsurprisingly, the name of his past kingdom. Alvarez had a grim look on her face as she talked.

“We were told by a knight earlier, whom is friends with a knight from Kingdom Edgar, that Ichirou plans on threatening the kingdom in the next months.”

Jeremy’s stance turned from poised to alarmed. As did Jean’s.

“We’ve done nothing to deserve this attention,” said Jeremy.

Alvarez shook her head. “We didn’t offer any help in the Blood War. Ichirou is probably mad about our neutrality and that adds to the fact that we currently have his best knight under our protection.”

Jean looked at the floor as he felt the three pairs of eyes glancing at him. The unwanted attention, plus the recent news, made his skin crawl with nerves on end. 

“Nevertheless, the knight told us that we didn’t have much to worry about, mentioning that it was more of an empty comment than anything,” finished Alvarez. 

The prince released a loud sigh before simply saying, “Then we can’t cause a commotion.”

“I’ll check with the knights and report back to you,” spoke Jean. Jeremy looked at him for a second before stiffly nodding. It must’ve looked like a face of dismissal to the girls, but Jean saw Jeremy’s lips twitch before he turned around. Jean scoffed to himself. Even when the prince wanted to act mad, he looked absolutely adorable. The current pout on Jeremy’s lips had Jean’s fingers twitching with the need to reach out. But, he didn’t.

Afterwards, when they bid farewell to Alvarez and Laila, Jeremy decided to accompany him on his last round around the castle. This surprised Jean at first, knowing that the prince was currently not taken with him, but he didn’t complain about the company. The silence reigning over them was new and disconcerting. Jeremy looked to be deep in thought, so Jean decided not to talk for now. They reached the stalls momentarily to check on their horses. They stopped in their tracks to stare at the galloping horse running through the entrance. A knight sat on the horse, but from their view they could tell that he was barely holding on. Jean held his palm out, knowing that the horse would stop running when he reached them. The horse did, but just as soon as his running stopped, the knight fell from the saddle. 

Jean, alarmed, ran to the scene and bent down to check on the knight. Blood was pouring from his left hip and his face was beaten to a pulp. Jean placed his head down slowly to accommodate him and then took his armor and shirt off to cover the wound with the latter. He pressed and pressed while waiting for the nurses to arrive. As soon as they did, he moved away to let them work and carry him away. Jean sat on the ground, staring as the nurses moved into the castle. He suddenly remembered the prince and winced at his own half-naked state.

Jean felt a blind rush of panic go through him. His skin prickled with cold and dread. The prince had surely seen his scars and was now disgusted with him. He didn’t dare look, but he had to know what the prince was thinking.

Jeremy wasn’t staring at his scars. The prince was simply looking at his whole chest, as if he were drinking the sight in. Jean shifted slowly, causing his arms to flex just a bit, and watched as Jeremy’s face progressively turned redder. The cold in Jean’s chest turned to warmth. He cleared his throat to catch the prince’s attention. The prince’s gaze snapped up to his face, eyes wide from being caught. 

“You- You’re... I’ll see you tomorrow.” Jeremy immediately started to walk away, leaving Jean behind on the garden. Jean stared incredulously at his back as he walked away. The only thing that brought his mind off the weird exchange was his soaked trousers. He gulped and looked as blood dripped down his chest and unto his pants. A mocking laugh ringed at the back of his head. He looked down to see the wet spot on the grass and released a trembling breath. There was going to be no sleep tonight.

  
  
  


There’s not many moments in which Jean could say he felt exhausted. He’d gone through almost three days without any sleep and traveled through two kingdoms without an ounce of tiredness until the end. Patrolling the kingdom and training other knights in case of any threats proved to be a difficult matter. Derek told him that it would get easier as time went past. But between that and organizing the positions of the knights for the ball, Jean was feeling the weight of the days on his shoulders. Derek was in charge of positions outside the castle and Jean was in charge of positions inside the ballroom. He’d discussed the matter with Alvarez a hundred times now, but he still felt the fear of failing. 

It was the first time in a whole month that he had time to sit on his usual place in the garden. His thighs ached with exhaustion and his arms felt heavy where he dropped them. The bench was hot from the sunlight, but he actually enjoyed such heat in the cool afternoon. The usual group of kids were playing around the streets. What appeared to be a white cat was jumping from roof to roof as some older women cooked stew outside. Jean sighed heavily. The familiar sight calmed him, as did the sudden presence of the prince at his side. 

Jeremy smiled at him, a small yet blinding thing. Jean had already left his side of the bench available to sit, and the prince did so. He waited a couple of beats until the prince accommodated himself to stretch his legs out. 

“Long day?” Jeremy asked him. 

Jean nodded slowly and sighed. “More like long week.” Jean took a single glance at Jeremy, waited for the prince to nod, and took his armor off. Left only in his gray undershirt, Jean welcomed the cool weather and this time sighed of relief.

The prince chuckled under his breath. “Jean, you don’t have to worry so much. You’re doing a great job and the knights all look to be in good shape for the event.” 

Birds chirped around them, as if they were agreeing to Jeremy’s claim. 

Jean shook his head. “There’s much to perfect. The positions, the armors, which weapons to wear, battle plan in case of a commotion, and more. It all has to be done in the next five days.”

He looked at the prince and continued, “It’s my first time doing something of such importance and I cannot let you down.”

The prince raised his gaze to look at the sun and sighed. “I don’t think it’s possible for you to let me down, Jean. I believe in you, even if you do not. You’re the best knight in the four kingdoms, I shan’t be worried by anything.” 

A bird chirp. A breathe. A beat. A stare. Jean watched as the rays of sunshine illuminated the prince’s face and bathed him in gold. The freckles on his nose stood out the most today. If constellations happened during the day, Jeremy’s freckles would shame all the others. Orion, Hercules, none of them would compare. Jean wondered if Trojan poets used their prince as inspiration, sure enough that such a gorgeous sight deserved such worthy lengths of words. He wondered if Trojan artists used their prince as their muse. Do they draw him with ink, paint him with watercolors, and mold him to perfection? Worth of it all, is what Jeremy is. 

Looking quite like a golden angel, the prince opened his eyes and returned his gaze with a dimpled smile. Jean felt like his heart was caught in his throat. He mapped out the prince’s face in all his golden glory. Here is where he shined most, Jean thought. Here in the sunlight, surrounded by greenery, and smelling irrevocably like _ roses _, Jean’s favorite scent. 

He didn’t know if it was the numbness turning into feeling in his body, the breeze flowing between them like water, or simply the prince sitting there in all his godly glory, but Jean leaned in. He leaned in until he was a breath away from Jeremy’s face, who was still staring at him like he built the walls of Troy. Jean shivered as he felt the prince’s breath on his lips. His heartbeat was alarming, and it seemed that his heart was trying to come out and place itself on Jeremy’s hands. 

What if, what if, what if? The question repeated itself in the back of Jean’s head, but this time, he didn’t pay it any attention. All he was conscious about was how from this distance, Jeremy’s lips resembled Cupid’s bow in more ways than one. 

“May I kiss you?” The words were out of his mouth before Jean could comprehend what he’d done. He didn’t have much time to panic or take them back. Jeremy released the smallest gasp Jean’s ever heard in his life. The prince’s gaze opened into this beautiful pool of yearning and Jean has been struck until the end of the time. 

“Yes.” It’s more a breath than a word, but Jean felt like his life had finally steadied as he leaned in to press his lips against the prince’s. Another gasp, another beat and Jeremy’s arms wrapped around Jean’s neck. Jean, in turn, placed his hands on the prince’s waist and pressed him closer until they didn’t know where one started and where one ended. It was completely silent except for the sound of Jean’s heart beating and the pleased sighs coming from the prince’s mouth. 

Jean kissed Jeremy until the only thing keeping him conscious were the shivers traveling through the prince’s body whenever he stroked his back. It was seconds until Jean felt a different kind of pressure against his mouth and sunlight shined through his closed eyes. Kissing Jeremy was like tasting the first ray of light in the morning. Kissing Jeremy brought him alive, yet numbed him until the only thing he could feel was Jeremy’s tongue. Kissing Jeremy was holding the whole world in his hands and being kissed into oblivion. Jean believed that in another world, Aphrodite would’ve claimed Jeremy as the cause of the fall of Troy, because for that mouth many would fall.

The need to breathe was what separated them at last. Jean pulled away, but kept them close together. As soon as his eyes opened they fell on rosy lips. Said lips opened into a blinding smile and Jean finally looked up. Jeremy’s eyes were shining, diamond-like in the afternoon glow. His whole face was covered in pink, spreading up until his ears and down unto his neck. 

A minute of silence barely passed, but it was enough for Jean to realize what he’d done. His hands, which were still unconsciously stroking Jeremy’s back, stopped in their track. As he came back to his senses, a small frown formed in Jeremy’s face.

Jean gulped what felt like a stone in his throat, “I shouldn’t have done that.” 

“Why shouldn’t you have?” Jeremy didn’t stop caressing the back of his neck and Jean had to fight a sound back.

“Jeremy, you’re royalty.” This sentence did make the prince stop his movement and Jean barely held back a wince as Jeremy’s eyes started to dim.

“Is this why you’ve never done anything before? Because I’m royalty? Jean, I could be a nobleman or the king and that wouldn’t change how I feel. Don’t dismiss your feelings or mine because of fear,” snapped Jeremy. The hands located on his neck fell down back into their owner’s lap and Jean looked at them longingly. 

He reached out to grasp one and sighed of relief when Jeremy didn’t pull away. The prince still looked angry, but he turned his hand palm up to intertwine their hands.

“I don’t want to ruin your future. I’m not perfect Jeremy, and I will never be.”

He hadn’t even finished his sentence when Jeremy decided to reach out and cup his jaw in both of his hands with a fierce look in his eyes. “I don’t want you to be perfect, Jean. I want you just as you are.” 

“You’ll meet royals and important people next week Jeremy. Don’t hold back because of me.” 

Jeremy frowned again. “Is this what this is about? And what if I don’t meet someone on the ball? Would you still find excuses to justify this not happening?” 

Jean shook his head slowly and raised his hands to cover Jeremy’s with his own. “Try. Try to meet someone. You deserve the best in the world and so does the kingdom.” 

Jeremy’s eyes started filling with tears and Jean leaned in to kiss each one away. He was holding back some himself, but Jeremy was his priority first. Jean was scared about how the prince would react, but he simply nodded silently.

“I’ll try. I don’t think I’ll ever be capable of caring about someone like you. But, I promise I will try.” 

Jean closed his eyes, ignored the distant sound of his heart breaking, and said, “Thank you.”

  
  
  
  


The Castle of Troy was known to be the most beautiful of all castles in the four kingdoms. Their reputation spread until people took trips only to see the spectacular sight from outside, be it night or day. Years went past and it still lived up to its fame with its intricate designs and combinations of old and modern architecture. The inside was even better, but it was only meant for residents of the castle to marvel at. The only times that other citizens got to see the inside of the castle were on royal visits or royal events, such as today. 

There had been the buzz of excitement from the whole kingdom for weeks now. Everyone talked about what they would wear, who they would meant, and who the future king shall choose to dance with. The maids, the knights, the town women and men were all ecstatic to be in the same room as the prince. Jeremy, known for his open mind and kindness, invited everyone in the kingdom to attend. As a result, the streets were full to the brim. Women came in their flowy dresses and men came in their tailored suits ready to impress the royals. The night was beautiful, stars shining ahead and decorating the sky like diamonds. 

The ballroom was a sight to behold. Gold chandeliers decorated the ceiling, sapphires dripping down at the end of the lights. Above the chandeliers and decorating the entire ceiling was a beautiful and colorful painting of angels and goddesses splashing around in a lake. Bouquets of flowers were found in every corner and on the main stairway that reached the top floor. The white marble flooring shined almost as bright as the stars outside. A single man sat on a golden piano, playing what Jean immediately recognized as _ I. Allegro _. 

Chatter filled the room as they awaited for the prince’s arrival. Derek had already guided Jean through the positions where he would locate the King’s guard. Every one of his knights will stand outside guarding the castle while Jean’s group stays inside. Jean was currently waiting beside the staircase for the prince while he left his men to their assigned spots. The music ceased and the crowd put an end to their conversations. The piano man began his rendition of the anthem of Troy. The Trojan family began descending down the staircase. They all stood out with their beautiful features and fancy attires, but of course, the prince took all of Jean’s attention. Jeremy wore a red suit with gold embroidery. Red as a rose, gold as the sun. It hugged his body in the best way possible, showcasing his broad shoulders and strong legs. The golden buttons of his suit matched his styled hair. The dazzling smile he gave the crowd stopped breaths and started beats.

_ Gorgeous _, Jean thought. He felt enchanted, like he couldn’t take his eyes off the prince even if he tried his hardest to. The song ended as the royal family reached the last stair. There, Jeremy stopped while his family moved to the side.

“Good evening, everyone. I’m glad that all those who are here were able to make it. This is supposed to be a small speech of gratitude, but you’ve all know since my childhood how my mouth runs whenever I’m excited.” The crowd chuckled and Jeremy did so as well before continuing, “There’s no words to describe how hopeful I am for the future of my kingdom, and to know that I’ll be the one to lead it fills me with joy. You are all my family. My blood, sweat, and tears. I swear to protect you, lead you, and grant you peace until the end of time. This ball is to commemorate the end of a period, and the start of one. And so I ask you to enjoy the event to your fullest capabilities, to make wonderful memories, and to celebrate our kingdom. For Troy!”

The crowd chanted the last phrase back and broke into a cheer. The music started once again and the crowd went back to conversing and dancing. Jean made sure that all the knights were in position then turned to look at Jeremy. The prince had already been staring at him. Jeremy looked at him up and down and Jean remembered to thank Laila for dressing him when he saw her later down the evening. She had taken a whole week before deciding on making him wear a midnight blue suit with silver buttons that went sideways and down his chest. Laila later decided to add on a single, diamond ear crawler to finish up his attire. The way Jeremy’s eyes dilated and slowly dragged up his body sent shivers of thrill down Jean’s spine. He looked like he was about to come over, but just then a family of commoners approached the prince and began to talk to him. Jean held back a sigh. The only reason he wouldn’t complain to himself was because now he was free of looking his fill of the prince’s backside. 

The song turned into something upbeat and Jeremy was finally dragged into a dance. Jean frowned to himself as he saw the woman’s arms wrap around the prince’s neck. Jeremy spinned them around and showcased his dancing ability. The woman was laughing from glee and proceeded to whisper something in Jeremy’s ear. The prince laughed back and Jean felt his hands clenching at his sides. 

_ You asked for this _, he reminded himself.

That didn’t change the bitterness in his chest when Jeremy moved on to his fourth dancing partner. It was someone Jean knew as one of the cooks and was named Alex. They approached Jeremy with a smile and Jean had to bite back a scowl as Jeremy took their hands in his to lead them into a waltz. The man after that flirted with the prince throughout the whole dance. Jean felt like his jaw was going to break from pressure. The only thing that healed the momentarious wounds on his heart were the long glances Jeremy gave him whenever he was on the prince’s eyesight.

At one point, Alvarez and Laila had reached him and started a conversation about the coronation. Jean hadn’t been paying attention to what they were saying, as his eyes kept drifting back to look at the prince. Jeremy was currently laughing at a young woman, no more than fifteen years old, and twirling her around the dance floor. Jean bit back a small smile, but it ended up turning into another scowl when another man greeted the prince and asked him for a dance.

Jean’s scowl quickly turned into a frown of confusion as Jeremy denied the man’s request. Alvarez and Laila had been gone by now, so Jean had no one to talk to about the prince’s actions. He was about to turn around and look for them when Jeremy’s steady gaze fell on him. The prince wore the soft smile he reserved only for Jean and began walking towards him. Jean’s heart stuttered and turned into a bird, ready to fly into its owner’s hands.

“I see someone is enjoying the ball.” Jeremy chuckled softly and regarded his tense position with raised eyebrows.

Jean cleared his throat. “I’m sure you’re the one enjoying the most from the two of us.”

Jeremy looked confused for a second, but his expression cleared with understanding. A mischievous expression took over his face.

“Someone’s jealous?” The prince took a step closer.

Jean gulped and shook his head. “Not at all, Your Highness.”

“Then, why have you been looking at my dancing partners like you want to stab them through the back?” They were suspiciously close now, but none of the people around them blinked an eye.

“Anything you have to say?” Jeremy asked him.

“You look gorgeous tonight,” replied Jean in an instant. The prince inhaled sharply and stared at him with wide eyes.

It was a wonder how Jeremy didn’t know that he had the whole crowd wrapped around his finger, Jean included. He always looked surprised whenever someone complimented him on his attire for the night or in his manner of talking.

“May I have this dance?” Jeremy suddenly asked. This caught Jean off guard, but who was he really to deny a royal, Jeremy above it all? He took the prince’s offered hand and let him drag them into the middle of the gallery. 

An orchestra had arrived shortly before the next dance started. The prince softly dropped his hands on Jean’s shoulders with a smile. Jean smiled back and placed his own hands on Jeremy’s waist. They swayed to the sweet symphony of _ Elvira Madigan _. As the classical piece reached the middle of its length, Jean decided to twirl Jeremy and lead them into a more complicated dance. The prince appeared to be pleased and followed his steps patiently. Jean’s eyes traced the swift moments in which Jeremy’s body flowed with the music. He pulled the prince closer, yet kept his steps precise. Jeremy was staring up at him in what appeared to be awe. Such awe was reflected on Jean’s eyes. There was no one else in the room but Jeremy, no one else in the world but Jeremy.

He dipped Jeremy and recovered with grace, glad to see the proud smile in the prince’s face. He pressed even closer to the prince. Jeremy’s smile turned into a flirty grin, awe turning into desire like water falling into fire. The hands in his shoulders had shifted closer to his neck and Jean held his breath for a moment before twirling the prince again. From this close, he could see the way Jeremy’s pupils dilated until brown was swallowed by black. Jean only expected his gray eyes to look the same. As they reached the end of the piece they slowed into swaying once again. Jeremy wet his lips and Jean followed the movement like a thief on a mission. The corner of Jeremy’s lips twitched in amusement. He had been caught. A few seconds and the orchestra finished, but Jean had already been struck. 

Claps filled the room and they straightened up to follow along. Jeremy smirked at him before bowing to signal the end of the dance. Jean bowed back and moved to follow him off the center stage and away from prying eyes. He reached his position and moved to accommodate himself when Jeremy reached out to stop him.

“Come with me,” said Jeremy. It took one look at his eyes to guess what he meant, yet Jean didn’t want to take any chances.

“Is that an order or a request, Your Highness?” 

Jeremy stepped closer once more, until their noses barely brushed and sighed against his lips. “It’s whatever you’ll have it as.” 

The lead knight had to look around and give some signals to the nearest of his men. When he finally turned to look at Jeremy to give him an answer, the prince looked impatient with every ounce of yearning reflected on his face. The prince didn’t wait another moment to pull him out of the ballroom, quickly moving in between bodies to get them as far away from the crowd as possible. Once they’d reached the hallways of the royal sector, Jeremy pulled him into the library near their strategy room. Jean distantly heard the lock of the door but focused on the rushed breaths coming from the prince’s mouth.

Jeremy pulled him close, falling back against the door and letting Jean crush their bodies together. A chill went down his spine at the whimper Jeremy made when Jean pressed his hand to the small of his back. Symphonies, Jean could make symphonies out of the sounds falling from Jeremy’s mouth.

“Jean,” murmured the prince. At the sound of his name, Jean stared into eyes as black as a pearl and waited patiently for the prince to continue. Jeremy licked his lips and cupped his chin with one hand. “Kiss me. Kiss me until I can’t breathe. Kiss me until I can’t remember my own name, only yours.” 

There was no other world, no other universe were Jean wouldn’t say yes. He leaned in and kissed Jeremy with an intensity he only used while sparing. His hands reached and reached until no part of Jeremy’s back was left untouched. The prince whimpered beneath his lips and wrapped his arms around Jean’s neck, moving his hands up into Jean’s hair. Warmth and the smell of roses filled his senses. Jean groaned as the prince bit his bottom lip. He pressed him against the door, trapping the prince between the door and his own body. The hands in his hair clutched black strands and Jean groaned once again. He moved to kiss the prince’s neck and savored the soft sighs muttered against his ear. Is this what people describe as heaven? The body of the prince leaning into his and lips parting open to let Jean do whatever he wanted. Is it the trust of another person’s pleasure on your hands? Is it the pride that comes with them falling apart at the seams from your own actions? Is heaven Jeremy? Is Jeremy heaven?

There’s a point while Jean was kissing the freckles in Jeremy’s collarbones when the prince decided take his blazer off. Jean let him, he let the prince pull the blue blazer off his shoulders until he was left with his tight, gray shirt and blue trousers. Jeremy’s eyes traced up his body and Jean watched in amusement as he groaned and slammed his head back into the door.

“You’re so sexy it’s unlawful.” The prince was about to say something else but Jean leaned in and chuckled against the corner of his mouth, “Stop talking.” 

They continue their ministrations for awhile until they’re both without their blazers and their shirts are halfway unbuttoned and hickeys are blooming on Jeremy’s collarbones. While Jean was a man on a mission, Jeremy decided to kiss and bite Jean’s ear where his single earring shined. Jean reached up to nose into Jeremy’s cheek and felt the prince slowly melt into him. He smiled against a dimple and kissed it for good measure. Jeremy giggled at his actions.

Jean sighed and licked his swollen lips, rubbing knots off Jeremy’s back with his thumb. He whispered against the prince’s forehead, “I have to make rounds around the garden.” 

Jeremy looked up at him, kissed him once more before nodding. “Do so, but promise me something.”

“Anything,” Jean said right away.

The prince smiled at his trust, but leaned in to lick his jaw. Jean shivered and closed his eyes to fend off the need to kiss the prince again.

“Come to my room after the ball is done. Nothing has to happen. I just want to spend time with you.” Jeremy intertwined their hands and looked up at him as he awaited an answer. 

Jean smiled down at the nervous prince before nodding his acceptance. “Of course.” 

The smile Jeremy gave him had to be the most beautiful thing he’d witnessed in his life. It rivaled sunrises and the richest gold in the kingdom. It was a smile to fight for, a smile to fall for, and a smile to long for. Jean had done all of those things in the past months, longing more than anything, as he didn’t know he had a chance until last week. 

There was no way to describe the happiness on Jeremy’s face, but Jean was completely sure that he himself must’ve looked like a lovefool. He couldn’t look away from the rosy cheeks and the debauched aftermath that was Jeremy Knox after being kissed breathless. Jean flicked his nose to get the glazed look out of his eyes. Jeremy slapped his hand away and rubbed his nose with a frown. That response only garnered a loud laugh from Jean, but Jeremy didn’t seem to complain, as he grinned big at the sound that came out of his knight’s mouth.

“Leave now, or we both never will,” pointed out Jeremy. With a sigh, Jean moved off the prince to fix himself and pull on his blazer. He gave the prince his red blazer, snorting to himself when Jeremy simply stared at his lips instead of taking the clothing item. Jean then decided to help him and dressed up the prince too. Jeremy blushed a fiery red and moved his hands away to continue doing it by himself. 

Jean, having finished already, leaned back against a bookshelf to watch as the prince pulled himself together. The flustered motions said a lot of how the prince felt at the moment, and so Jean decided to let him take command of whatever happened next.

“I’ll go ahead in case people wonder where I scattered of to for an hour.” Jeremy moved to open the door, but Jean grasped his arm and turned him back around to kiss him one last time. The prince moaned against his lips and kissed like a man drowning and getting the first taste of water. He released the prince and let him go. Jeremy looked at him for various seconds before deciding to leave the room. The door closed, and Jean was left alone in the library.

The long walk to the garden felt extremely shorter, maybe because his thoughts were full of Jeremy, particularly Jeremy’s smile. The cool wind made his hair stand on end and caused goosebumps to form on his skin. Even from here, you could listen to the orchestra play _ Swan Lake _ with fervor. The melody went from its soft beginning into a harsh cello. Jean shivered and walked off the thrill of his earlier actions. Once he reached the stables and got a look around, he turned to go back into the ballroom to watch the orchestra finish the piece. Before he could walk two steps, arms grabbed him from behind his back and pulled him to the floor. Jean’s heart thundered at the movement and moved to pull away, but it had been too late. As he tried to elbow the person on the chest, quick hands placed a velvet blindfold on his eyes. He trashed and moved his body but before he could scream out commands to the nearest knights, the person placed a wet cloth in his mouth. The last thing Jean remembered after that was longing to hold a golden angel before falling into a deep sleep.

Silence. Complete silence took over the ballroom. The ball had finished as soon as the announcement had been made to the royal family. Now there only stood the prince and the entire guard. They were all expecting something, but they didn’t know what. The prince was currently walking in circles with clenched fists. This was the most unnerving thing to the knights, the tense position the prince currently had. Never before had they seen him like this: a contained ball of anger and tension. 

A beat and he turned to face the tight group of knights. “We’re leaving to Palmen, now.”

One knight standing at the left of the room spoke up, “Your Highness, aren’t this extreme measures to take for a single fallen knight?”

Derek, who stood beside the prince, glared at the knight for his cold words and shook his head harshly. Jeremy had already heard everything he needed to hear and walked up to the knight, who straightened up immediately.

Another thing none of the knights had ever seen: the current hollowness in Jeremy’s eyes. The bright spark that always seemed to shine on the prince’s gaze was long gone, leaving a muted brown the color of fallen autumn leaves.

“That was not a request, young knight. But, if you need a more specific reason then let me say this: I will not be king without Jean Moreau at my side.” 

The prince turned to the other knights with a crooked smile. “Anyone else have any comments?” 

All the knights shook their heads profoundly. Jeremy’s wicked smile got bigger at the sight. “Let’s leave, then.”

  


The Kingdom of Palmen. A kingdom known for its great fighters and wise battle strategy. The only people that Jeremy knew had what he needed for what he was about to do next. They were immediately led in through the grand orange doors and into the great hall, where Queen Danielle sat at her throne. She stood up and gave him a smile, yet one small enough to show that she saw his inner turmoil.

“Prince Jeremy Knox of Troy. What a pleasant visit.” 

Jeremy bowed and his knights followed. “Your Highness, I’m sorry to interrupt you in such late hours.”

The queen merely shook her head. “You could never bother me. Kevin heard of what happened and called me in as soon as he could.” 

Jeremy was about to ask about said man when he heard the doors of the hall opening. Right there in all his glory stood Kevin Day, leader of the Queen’s Guard of Palmen. His most trusted knight stood at his side, a man Jeremy recognized as Andrew Minyard. They walked into the hall and bowed to the queen before doing the same towards Jeremy.

“Your Highness, I’ve heard of what’s happened,” said Kevin. 

The words almost mixed up from how quickly Jeremy spoke, “So, you will help me?”

The prince did not expect the grim look that took over the knight’s face. A loud flame of anger burned in Jeremy’s chest as he snapped, “He’s your friend. You left him back at Edgar and yet he never disclosed your escape plan. How could you?”

Kevin frowned, but Jeremy could see his words had hit the target as a guilty expression took over. 

The knight began to reply to his accusations, “I cannot leave the kingdom without protection! There’s no–”

He was cut off by the queen’s right hand man, also known as Neil Josten, who stood right at her side by the throne. “We’ve discussed this already, Kevin. Andrew will be left on duty while you go with Jeremy.”

The knight looked ready to argue but a look at Jeremy’s clenched fists and deadly expression took the words out of his mouth. He simply nodded. Jeremy unclenched his hands and sighed before turning back to face the queen.

“Thank you, Your Highness.” 

There was a glint in her eyes as she replied, “My pleasure. It would be a shame to not have a witness see you pull the Moriyama's to their knees for what they’ve done.”

“This is not a fight, Your Highness.” 

Danielle raised a brow and smirked, “Then, why do you look ready to risk it all?”

Jeremy’s smile was a wicked little thing, a sight unnerving enough to put the strongest knights in the room on end. “It’s not a fight. They took the thing that matters most in my life. I’ll take theirs.” 

“And what is that?”

“Power.”

It took approximately an hour to get all the knights to Edgar. The Queen of Penn, Noora Key, had sent an army of women to fight for them. Jeremy was thrumming with pent up energy, his feelings tight-locked into his chest. To others he appeared calm since they left Palmen, but his thoughts were still filled with the missing knight and what they’ve done to him. He refrained from getting angry again. Jean would tell him to calm down. Jean would speak to him and rub his shoulders until all the tension drifted away. He would make him laugh with his incredulous expressions. Jean would stare at him with his gray eyes, bright like the moonlight, and murmur the things they had to do the next day. He would hold his gaze and mutter with all the certainty in the world, “It will all be alright.” Jeremy felt his eyes tearing up and held back a sob, it wasn’t the time to have a breakdown. Later he would, with the knight back in his arms. 

Kevin and Derek gave the order to stand back and so they did. It went like this for about ten minutes before they signaled them to move. Jeremy went up ahead in his horse, fast as lighting and not giving a care for the citizens that stood on the streets gaping at him. Surprisingly enough for the knights, but Jeremy had already known this would happen, the castle doors opened at their arrival. The prince shortly asked a knight of Edgar for an audience with the king. As expected, they denied their request. Jeremy had simply shot an arrow to the knight’s shoulder and walked into the room. Before they had invaded Edgar, Jeremy had given short orders of the following: Do not kill, simply injure if needed. Troy would not have blood in its hands.

King Ichirou sat on his throne. A composed man without a care in the world. About fourteen knights stood at his side, all with their swords drawn.

Jeremy walked up to the king, but didn’t bow to him. It was known in the four kingdoms that any royal who makes an act of treason to another, did not deserve an act of respect from the other. It was also a full blown _ fuck you _ to the face. Jeremy was glad to see a frown forming in the king’s forehead.

“To what do I owe the presence of the Kingdom of Troy, Penn, and Palmen?” Ichirou Moriyama was a man made of cold. A complete different kind to Jean, whose cold was a comforting breeze in a hot summer day. The King of Edgar was made of hard edges, from his expressions to his words.

“Just hours ago I was told that my lead knight was kidnapped from my grounds by three men wearing your armor. I’ll let it be known that I’ve taken this as an utmost disrespect, both to me and him. I swear on all the gods and goddesses above that if I find him dead, I’ll have no mercy for all the men standing behind you,” said Jeremy.

“And for me? Will you have mercy for me, young prince?” There was a taunting smile on the king’s face, as if waiting for the reaction of an angry child.

“You’ll end up as your brother if it’s the last thing I do.” 

Nothing. The smile fell from Ichirou’s face and instead there was left nothing. Not even a spark of sorrow for the mention of the death of his little brother. 

“You won’t be king if you shed blood from another kingdom,” the king mentioned bluntly.

“No, I won’t. Without him, I’ll never be king.” 

“All of this for a single knight?” Ichirou raised an eyebrow at him, clearly interested but confused about his actions.

Jeremy nodded once, yet felt the words rumbling in his throat from the truth they carried. “Anything and everything for him.”

The king stood from his throne and walked up to the middle of the room, where Jeremy stood. The knights behind Jeremy, Kevin and Derek included, began to draw their swords, but Jeremy stopped them with a raised hand. The king squinted at him from behind his old glasses and laughed drily.

“All for Jean Moreau, who would’ve known? The most despised in a kingdom, the most loved in another. You realize what he did, Knox? I exiled him as he broke his promise to protect Riko. And yet, he goes to another kingdom and has the audacity to still be a knight? How could I not be offended!” 

“Your matters of childishness and vengeance do not excuse what you’ve done,” spat Jeremy, the anger in his bones spreading like a wildfire.

“Take him! Take him for all I care!” The king spoke loudly, an incredible contrast from his still figure.

“I’ll say this once and I won’t say it again. Do not dare put a finger on him or another of my knights ever again while we’re not at war. I will not speak of Troy’s future decisions on amiability with this kingdom. But I will forget what has happened for the best of both realms.”

Ichirou Moriyama stared at him for various minutes, taking in his tense pose and the naked truth in his eyes. He then started to nod and said, before turning to leave, “Jean Moreau is in the dungeon. He’s alive, if barely so. It was great making amends with the future King of Troy. I’ll see you sometime later in the future, Jeremy.”

Jeremy expected him to have finished, but the king said some last words. “Knights? Strike.”

The prince only got a single look at his back before he left the room. The King’s Guard of Edgar charged towards them. Jeremy drew his sword and lifted it up, the first words the king had said blaring in his head. Jeremy felt his heart snap into two. He screamed.

  
  


The corridor that went down to the dungeons was dark, not a single lantern placed on the walls. Jeremy’s lungs were barely functioning. His wrists hurt from all the stabbing and ducking that had gone above. All of the knights of Edgar were left injured on the floor. They had killed one from each kingdom. Jeremy repeated their names in his head over and over again, knowing that he would later have to give a message to the queens. They’d been sure to tell him that they knew losing lives would be a possibility with the battle strategy the Edgar knights had. Still, their deaths weighed on the prince. 

This at least took his mind off Jean, if just for a moment. As soon as he saw the cages though, he went frantic while looking around. He turned a corridor and stopped in his feet. His sword fell at his side.

There sat Jean Moreau inside a cage, a dirty cloth covering his mouth and chains clutched to his hands and feet. The knight was on his knees and staring at the ground without moving an inch. At the sound of Jeremy’s sword falling at the floor, his head snapped up. Jeremy’s breath caught as gray eyes looked back at him. He picked up his sword, ran forward and smashed the lock down. The cage opened and Jeremy ignored the footsteps behind him and rushed in. He fell to his knees in front of Jean, mirroring his position, and hastened to take the gag off his mouth. 

A single breath fell from his mouth and then, “Jeremy.” The prince let out a sob and cupped the knight’s face in his hands. His shoulders were shaking from his weeping, but Jean leaned in until their foreheads touched. They sat there, Jean breathing in the familiar scent of the prince while he cried his pain and fear away. He murmured reassurances and nuzzled his cheeks until Jeremy opened his eyes.

“I was so scared I was going to lose you, I almost started to lose myself,” Jeremy said against his lips. 

Jean frowned before smiling softly. “I don’t think I’m capable of wanting to leave this world after I met you.” 

Another sob escaped Jeremy’s mouth, his lips trembling with the force of trying to hold more in. He shook his head repeatedly and mumbled, “I’ve caused you pain.”

Jean nodded slowly, but he held his eyes with the force of a thousand men and women. Jeremy freed his hands and feet from the chains after he regained his composure. That quickly changed as he saw the red marks on Jean’s wrists. He tried to reach out to touch them with trembling hands, but instead, Jean reached up to thumb at the tears on Jeremy’s cheeks.

“You pierce my soul. I am half agony, half hope.” Jean thumbed a tear away and then proceeded to kiss his cheek. Jeremy felt his heart thrum in the familiar way it always did around the knight. _ Home _ , his heart whispered. _ Home _.

Jean paused for a moment, but then declared with passion, “I do love nothing in the world so much as you.” 

The last tear fell like a petal. The world settled. Icarus fell, but into the arms of an ocean. An ocean as cold and gray as Jean Moreau. An ocean as strong and resilient as Jean Moreau. 

Words that Jeremy would use to describe Jean Moreau? Cold, ocean, gray, and storm. The storm that happens for a reason. The storm that inevitably ends with sunshine, just how Jean inevitably ends with Jeremy. 

Jeremy closed his eyes, his heart a tattoo on his chest, and kissed Jean on the lips. A minuscule, barely there touch, but it held a million feelings shared between them.

“I love you. I have loved none but you.” Such words were a mystery to both of them months ago. For one, a phrase from fairytales. For the other, a phrase from dreams. Yet, there they were. Holding onto each other’s hands, whispering poetry along lips, and trusting with their whole heart that _ this is it _. Jeremy laughed at his idiocy from weeks ago. He had really thought he could hold back his feelings for this man. This wonderful and incredibly kind man. How could one not fall for Jean Moreau? A man made of selflessness and survival. How could he live without his lips against his skin? Always kissing away like a beggar. How could Jeremy deny him his heart when it was entirely Jean’s?

There was nothing more any of them could say. They had said enough. Their hands intertwined were enough. The surety of the other in their arms was enough. 

Jeremy breathed in the scent of the ocean and looked up at Jean, who immediately smiled at him despite his tired posture. He brushed a black curl back from Jean’s eyes and whispered, “Let’s go home.”

  
  
  


Complete silence reigned over the Kingdom of Troy for the next few days. News had gone around the people in a flash. They whispered about their prince and the extreme actions he had taken to protect his knight. Jean thought they were going to be negative comments, but people praised their prince with compliments and smiles. If Jeremy took such measures just to save a single knight, what would he do to save the people? They whispered excitedly amongst themselves about the future. The kingdom seemed to be under great protection. 

The reason why the domain was silent was because they were waiting. Waiting for what? Jean asked himself for millions of times until he heard a conversation between two other knights. Jeremy had apparently taken a bunch of commoners from Edgar. He had seen their distraught faces and homeless appearance and had asked each knight to get a commoner to Troy. They had ended up being fallen merchants, maids, and even a few knights. It was known between the four realms that if one kingdom took people from another by force, it was a matter of deep offense.

Why had Jeremy done it when he knew the consequences? Jean was prepared for a war to break out, but it never did. Today, the knights were told that Ichirou Moriyama had simply sent a letter of acceptance and apology for his brisk decision. The Kingdom of Troy and the Kingdom of Edgar were back on neutral ground. Jean had sighed of relief at the news.

Later that day, he found Jeremy waiting for him on the bench of the garden. Jean smothered down the wrinkles on his shirt and sat down beside the prince. 

Jeremy regarded him with a smile. “How are you? Are the nightmares still going?” 

When they came back to the castle, Jean began having flashbacks in his sleep of the time he’d spent on the castle while under Riko’s command. Nights were short and futile. Jean slept while watching the stars shine but woke to the dark hugging him until he couldn’t breathe. He spent most of his time at the library. Granted, half of the time his thoughts were full of a certain someone and his eyes continued to drift to the door, but it was extremely better than staying in his room. Maybe it was the memory of Jeremy pressed against the door that calmed him, or it was the ghost of dead fingers pressing against his throat changing to a warm hand stroking his neck. 

Regardless, his nightmares were slowly disappearing and beginning to be replaced by long dreams. Dreams that contained freedom and gold. Dreams that contained the castle and Jeremy.

Jean looked at said man and nodded. “They still happen, but it’s getting better every day that passes.” 

The prince had even gone to the point of suggesting sleeping droughts, but Jean had denied the offer. He had to learn to fend off his past by himself now, or he never would. From then on, Jeremy had made his way to spend more time with Jean during the day. He’d even gone to the sparring training today, where he received glares from Jean the entire time. Jean wouldn’t complain about the way Jeremy’s eyes had dragged up his body, his eyes heated and shining in the sunlight. It was really hard to concentrate, even more so when Jean took his break and went up to Jeremy. He started talking to the prince about future battle plans, but he saw how the prince’s eyes strained on his lips as he spoke. 

Jean smirked as he remembered the occurrence. “Did you enjoy practice?” He asked the prince.

Jeremy blinked at the sudden change of subject, but immediately understood as he saw the smug smile on the knight’s face. He returned the smirk with a coy look.

“Why ever are you asking?” 

“I’d say that as future king you should be paying attention to your knights’ progress,” answered Jean. By the time he finished talking, he’d moved his gaze to stare at the freckles on the prince’s nose. 

“Oh, but I was.” Jeremy’s smile was a full, flirty thing. The prince leaned in and gazed up at him, Jean’s eyes trailing his movement. 

“I don’t think I’m capable of looking anywhere else when you’re in the room,” continued the prince. Jean’s breath caught in his throat, but he knew the prince’s game by now.

He let his face hover near Jeremy’s, tilting his head in a way that it seemed he was about to kiss him, but ended up not doing so. “You were not looking, you were staring.” 

Jeremy’s eyes mapped out his whole face. Jean took this pause to reach out and grab the prince’s hands, intertwining their fingers and tugging the prince closer. Birds chirped around them and the breeze blew by them. This kind of silence was comforting, something Jean cherished every time it happened. 

A single ray of sunshine fell on Jeremy’s face, making his eyes glow a golden brown. His freckles burned bright against his face. The heat in his eyes battled that of the sun. Two words fell from his mouth like a prayer.

“Kiss me.”

Jean had to contain his smile, but he squeezed Jeremy’s hands to show him he’d been heard. Jean leaned in and kissed the next words from Jeremy’s mouth, words that suspiciously sounded familiar. A phrase made up of three words. A phrase Jeremy had tattooed on Jean’s heart since they’d met. A simple and quiet _ I love you. _

Kissing Jeremy always felt like the first time. A bundle of emotions exploding in his chest and warmth filling him up and numbing him until all he could feel was Jeremy’s lips on his. Jean coaxed his mouth open with deliberate slowness, catching Jeremy’s whimpers and bottling them inside his heart. Jeremy’s hands left his to move up and into his hair. He tugged on a few strands and nosed at Jean’s throat while he groaned at the sensation. Jeremy’s lips left a trail down his neck made up of small pecks and one or two bites. Jean wrapped his arms around the prince’s waist and pulled him into his lap.

It felt like someone had ignited a fire that wouldn’t be consumed. A rose on fire, yet neither the flower nor the fire ever died. Jean’s hands burned against Jeremy’s back, the fire spreading until Jean didn’t have a space untouched. Jeremy’s hands moved from his hair to his neck, where he thumbed at his tense shoulders. Jean relaxed at the touch and tilted his head back, leaving his mouth pliant against Jeremy’s, who took the invitation and kissed him breathless. Jean let Jeremy take charge for a moment while he traced his hands on the prince’s thighs, thumbing at his waist when he went back up. Jeremy had the body of the statues that were found in the castle. Lean, strong, and beautiful. Artisicians carved each muscle into marble, but Jeremy was made like this naturally. An angel amongst men.

His nose was full of the scent of roses. He almost felt high with it, in the brink of overwhelmed but never crossing the line. Jean pressed his nose against Jeremy’s neck, left a kiss there, and whispered, “You’re so fucking gorgeous. I wish I could paint you in bed and write you poems until the sun set and you were all the light I would need to continue.”

Jeremy trembled in his arms, a shiver running down his spine and a gasp leaving his strawberry red lips. He cupped his jaw and gave him a deep kiss that had Jean grasping at his waist. When Jeremy pulled away, there was a drunk smile dimpling his cheeks and illuminating his face. 

“You make me want to do terrible things, Jean Moreau.” Jeremy thumbed his jaw and chuckled softly.

Jean bit Jeremy’s bottom lip and smiled at the whine he received. “You make me like this, Jeremy. An insatiable lovefool.” The prince laughed again. Jean stared at the blinding smile in awe. It was a smile made to revive lives and end wars. A treasure made of gold.

A finger poked his cheek and Jean snapped out of his thoughts to find the prince staring back. “You’re staring,” whispered Jeremy.

With a short laugh, Jean left a single kiss on the prince’s finger and answered, “How could I not?”

The prince drew his hand away and regarded him with a smile. Taking this as the opportunity that it was, Jean observed the prince. Jeremy looked debauched to say the least. The rise and fall of his chest showed how winded the kiss had left him. Pink patches covered his neck, but Jean knew they wouldn’t bruise. His shirt had the first three buttons opened, showcasing the freckles that coated his collarbones. Apollo’s body, Zeus’ strength. The sun shone behind his back. It appeared as a halo around his head. The beauty of the prince was otherworldly, a thing from fairytales. Jean could say with all the certainty in the world that there was no other sight more beautiful than Jeremy Knox. 

By the time he’d done his sixth round of ogling the prince, Jeremy began to talk. Jean thumbed at the naked patch of skin from where his shirt had risen up. He was touching his back dimples, Jean was almost sure, and if to go by the way Jeremy shivered as he spoke, he was doing something right.

“The coronation is tomorrow.” He waited for the prince to continue, but Jeremy didn’t say anything else after that. He looked to be deep in thought and Jean debated his words before finally saying them out loud.

“Are you nervous?”

Jeremy chuckled drily. “Nervous is an understatement. My thoughts have been bothering me since the morning. I know I’m ready, I can feel it. I just wonder, will I be a good king? Will the people believe in me? In what I do? What I choose? Somehow it feels like the whole world has fallen on my shoulders in the past twenty-four hours. Every maid or knight I see halt in their steps to give me this smile full of _ trust _. Their future depends on me. What if I stumble? What if I act wrongly?”

Jean let the words simmer in the air for a moment, but as soon as Jeremy looked at him he started talking. “Then, you assume your consequences and stand back up. Leading the kingdom won’t be an easy task, you’ve known that from the start. Yet, you’ve worked so hard to be where you’re at right now. The things you’ve accomplished at such an early age, the support you’ve gotten from your people, none of those things are in vain. You inspire them. You, with your kindness, compassion, and fairness, are going to lead the kingdom into a great future. Don’t for a second doubt yourself. They will follow you. They will trust you. There’s no other person in the world that deserves this more than you.” 

Tears had started to gather in Jeremy’s eyes. Jean reached out to hold his hands again. 

“You’ll be there with me, right?” The prince asked him, a tremble in his voice. He wasn’t talking about the coronation, but about his future as King of Troy.

Jean nodded and gave him an encouraging smile. “Right beside you. Always.”

Jeremy smiled back, teary eyed and shining as bright as the sun. Jean’s world settled. A word, one he’d never thought about before, came into his mind. It was unlike the others in the way they came and went. It almost felt unreal, like this was only a dream and he was to wake in a minute. But he still sat there, Jeremy dropping his head onto his shoulder, sitting comfortably in his lap and dropping loving kisses on his neck. Jean still sat there, gazing at the kingdom with his heart full and the sun caught in his arms. 

_ Home _.

  


Bells rang, people walked in the hall, and excited chatter started bouncing off the walls. It was midday, and it was time for the Royal Coronation. Jean stood in a separate room guarding the door for any intruders while Jeremy got ready. The maids were dressing the prince with the richest fabrics in the kingdom. Jean forced himself to look at the door and not at any glimpse of skin he got from the corner of his eye. By the time they were done, Jean regarded the prince with appreciation. Jeremy looked devine with his red and gold attire. He wore the badges of Troy with honor and his father’s ring on his left middle finger. The gold band, located right next to his ring finger, gave Jean a shock when he first saw it. Not of fear, but of _ want. _He decidedly kicked those thoughts to the back of his head and continued ogling the prince.

A soon-to-be king. Jean could not be any prouder. He could see Jeremy’s nervousness when he wrung his hands together while the maids chose his footwear. He gave the prince an encouraging smile and watched successfully as the prince’s shoulders slowly relaxed. Jean knew, knew with his whole heart and mind, that Jeremy would be a great king. The maids stopped accessorising him and began working with his hair. Jean had to fight back a snort when one of them tried to pull the prince’s hair into spikes. They ended up leaving the curls on their natural state and instead tidied up his tousled hair. 

The maids left the room after Jeremy thanked them and praised their work. They had scrambled out of the room with red cheeks and whiplashed smiles. Another bell rang, signaling the last thirty minutes until the event. Jean watched as Jeremy sat down on a chair, breathing evening out and eyes closing in what appeared to be meditating. As the prince did his activity, Jean went to check on the other knights and give them their commands for when they went into the hall. Edgar did back down, but Jean didn’t want to risk anything. 

Derek stopped him on his way back to Jeremy. The older knight dropped a hand on Jean’s shoulder and said, “There’s no other man I’d rather leave my position to than you, Jean. When Jeremy becomes king, you’ll be the leader of the King’s Guard from then on. You’ve shown me great potential on this past six months. I’m rather excited to see just how much you’ll grow and become the best knight of the whole four kingdoms. You’ll bring this kingdom the title of capital it should have. I’m proud of you, son.”

Jean schooled his expression to be blank, but he felt his own eyes betray himself and started to tear up. Derek, as if seeing the internal battle going on in Jean’s head, stepped closer and hugged the knight. Jean felt three soft pats being left on his shoulders and reciprocated the hug before moving away. 

“Thank you. None of this would have happened had it not been for you. I’ll do my best to lead as well as you did. Thank you for letting be a part of this, a part of the kingdom, a part of the guard, and a part of your life.” Jean saw the way the tears started to gather on the older man’s eyes and let a small smile show on his face. He’d never smile around the man before, and so wasn’t surprised when Derek froze where he stood. Jean squeezed his arm and left the scene, not trusting himself to move away if he hugged the knight again. 

When he reached the room again, Jeremy was standing up and pacing the room. As soon as he saw Jean, he sprinted up to him. Jean let out a small sound at the coalition, but steadied the prince. Jeremy shook under his hands and Jean began to stroke his back.

“I thought you did an exercise to calm yourself down.” 

Jeremy nodded. “It worked until I saw you weren’t here and started panicking.” 

His hands worked out a knot on Jeremy’s shoulders while he frowned at the prince. “Jeremy, breathe.”

The prince did as he was told. His body moved under Jean’s hands, his breath slowly going from uneven to steady.

Jeremy leaned in until his face was hidden in Jean’s neck and whispered against the blushing skin, “Can I even do this?”

Jean hummed. “Of course you can, and you will. Fate has brought you here.”

There was silence and then Jeremy looked up at him, kissing his chin and smiling cheekily. “Fate has brought me into your arms?”

Jean left a peck on Jeremy’s forehead and softly muttered, “I’d like to think so.”

The smile bloomed bigger and dimpled before Jeremy schooled his expression and left a peck on Jean’s lips. “Is this how you charm people? Poetic words and a handsome face?”

Jean chuckled and shook his head. He was about to answer but he was cut off by a loud sound. The last bell had rang. Jeremy closed his eyes and inhaled deeply, Jean thumbing his hands as he did so. 

Brown eyes appeared and the only thing Jean saw was calm. Jeremy gave him a small but true smile and said, “Let’s go.”

As soon as they reached the royal hall, Jean felt the anticipation flowing through the air as the chatter slowly started to stop. He entered the room alone, ignoring all the glances of awe he got and standing beside the throne. On the other side stood Jeremy’s family, who gave him sunny smiles and nods of acknowledgement. Jean bowed at them before turning back to scan the crowd. After checking that everyone was in place, he gave the knights at the door a nod. Alvarez, who stood right beside him, gave the orchestra a sharp signal. They started to play the anthem of Troy.

The gold doors opened and Jeremy Knox, Prince of Troy, walked in. Everyone in the crowd stood up and placed their right hand on their heart. Jean heard various gasps coming from the crowd and a single one coming from Jeremy’s mother. After that his mind and eyes focused on Jeremy as he slowly walked down the hallway. Staff in hand, gold and red coat placed on his shoulders, Jeremy looked otherworldly. A dream brought alive. His confident stand filled Jean of pride. The smile he gave the crowd, as beautiful as ever, only highlighted his beauty. It shone from trust, confidence, and happiness. Jean had never seen such a treasure before in his life.

Jeremy reached the end of the hall. He grinned at his family, earning teary smiles back, before turning to regard Jean. The knight looked at him patiently, waiting for something. He didn’t expect the wink sent his way, but he still scoffed when Jeremy quickly moved on to smile at Alvarez. The woman, even with all her hard stance and tense shoulders, had tears spilling from her eyes and wore such a proud smile even Jean felt his heart squeeze at such expression. 

The orchestra stopped. Jeremy turned to face the crowd. The orator in charge, standing behind the throne, began to speak.

“Here we stand, gathered in Trojan land, blessed by our deities. Here stands Prince Jeremy Knox The First, proven to be capable of protecting our kingdom and all those who are part of it. Blessed by anyone above, surrounded by loved ones, we start the coronation of the next King of Troy.”

The current king, Jeremy’s father, walked up to his son with the golden crown of Troy in his hands, its rubies shining and complimenting the prince’s attire. He placed the crown over Jeremy’s head, waiting until Jeremy started to speak to place it.

“I, Jeremy Knox The First, Prince of Troy, swear to protect and lead the kingdom with all my devotion. I swear to bring this kingdom the grand future it deserves. I swear to love it with my everything. I swear to maintain peace and trust between the people. I swear to guard the kingdom with my blood, sweat, and tears. I swear loyalty to Troy.”

The king carefully placed the crown on top of Jeremy’s head. Jean breathed in deeply and stared in awe as Jeremy stood there, a fierce expression on his face, and wearing the crown of Troy as if it was meant to be there all along.

“I hereby declare Jeremy Knox as the King of Troy,” finished the orator. Jeremy gave one tap of his staff against the floor and Jean stared at the crowd.

All together, they said, “Long May He Reign.”

A grin, one of the biggest Jean had ever seen, bloomed in Jeremy’s face as the crowd cheered. His family was giving him hugs and patting his back. Jean watched when, as soon as the royal family moved away, Alvarez ran and hugged Jeremy tightly. Jeremy laughed and kissed her cheek when she started to cry against his chest. Laila came over and ruffled Jeremy’s hair. The crowd started talking between themselves, excited chatter reaching Jean’s ears. 

There, in the middle of the crowd, he saw the familiar faces of Kevin Day and Neil Josten. He took one last look at Jeremy, saw him comforting Alvarez and blushing at her compliments, and walked up to his old acquaintances. Beside them stood the Queen of Palmen, Danielle Wilds, and her husband, Matt Boyd. They both gave Jean kind smiles and nods of acknowledgement before moving on to go congratulate Jeremy.

That left him alone with Neil, Kevin, and… Andrew Minyard. Jean stared down at the blond knight with a raised eyebrow before he remembered the last conversation he had with Neil, which consisted of him complaining about a certain short knight. Surprisingly enough, they stood close together, and Jean didn’t even bat an eye when Andrew placed his hand on Neil’s waist.

“Jean Moreau.” He directed his attention back to Neil’s grinning face. 

He nodded and said, “Neil Josten.”

“Is this what your conversations consist of? No wonder Neil has such awful social skills,” muttered Andrew, to which Neil let out a snort and Jean shrugged without disagreeing. 

Jean was about ask the redhead about his stay on Palmen when, suddenly, Kevin spoke up. “How are you?”

Jean stared at him before drily answering, “Alive and well.”

Kevin winced at his tone before nodding in understanding. The last time they had seen each other they had left in a rough patch. He didn’t expect the knight to continue talking, but he did. “One of these days, will you forgive me?”

It took some minutes for the question to hit, but when it did, Jean expected himself to hurt. It didn’t hurt at all, the question just reminded him of Jeremy giving him an ongoing talk about forgiveness.

He debated on what to say for some seconds but ended up saying what came to his mind first. “One of these days.” 

It was the most sincere response he could give the knight. Kevin took it for what it was and smiled at Jean, not deterred by the other knight not smiling back. He said his goodbyes to the knights and Neil, stating that he should be by Jeremy’s side while people greet him. Neil gave him a knowing look but let him get away with a quirk of his lips. 

When Jean reached Jeremy, the man was surrounded by the queens of Palmen and Penn. He wore a grateful smile as the woman promised their help on guiding him in his new life. Queen Noora gave Jeremy one last hug before leaving to go look for her wife. Jeremy talked to Queen Danielle for some minutes before they finally parted ways and she walked away with Matt following close behind. Jean stepped closer until he was beside him. 

Their shoulders brushed against each other and Jean had to bite back a smile. He stopped in front of Jeremy and looked down into his eyes. 

Jeremy smiled, glowing like the sun. Jean took a moment to appreciate the way the gold of his crown blended in with his light brown hair. The rubies stood out and somehow made Jeremy look even more like a dream. 

He stopped staring in favor to say something to Jeremy, although Jeremy didn’t look like he was about to complain about Jean ogling at him. Jean straightened his back and bowed his head. “My King.”

Jean heard a small laugh and he glanced up to catch Jeremy hiding a smile behind his hand. The new king shook his head and said, “Shut up or I’ll kiss you right now.”

“Doesn’t sound like much of a threat,” answered Jean, a cheeky smile displayed on his face. 

Jeremy shook his head in disbelief. “You dare to defy your King?” 

With a snort, Jean laughed along with the king and took a few seconds to calm down. Jean let the comfortable silence linger in the air, but decided to finally tell the prince what had been on his mind since he first wore the crown.

“I’m proud of you, Jeremy. You’re going to be a great king.” 

The answer he got was a loving stare and a hand brushing against his shoulder before moving away. “I couldn’t have done it without you.”

Jean’s heartbeat steadied as he spoke, “I’ll be with you every step along the way.”

Jeremy’s smile was a blinding thing, a miracle to look at, a treasure to yearn for. “I’m excited to see what the future holds.”

Never before had Jean felt this way. He’d always been taught to survive, not to think about what happened next. Everything was about focusing on the present and ignoring the future. It’s always been _ I’m alive, I’m alive, I’m alive. _ It never was _ I will be alive, I will be alive, I will be alive. _ Out of all the things his stay in the castle has taught him, this was one of the most important things. There was always something to hope for, be it a training match, a special dinner for any particular occasion, or sitting down in the garden and letting the breeze drift his thoughts away. There was always Jeremy to hope for. Tomorrow, he would see Jeremy’s smile. Next week, he would go horse riding with Jeremy. In a month, he would be kissing Jeremy against his satin sheets. Never before had Jean had _ this much _ to think of apart from surviving. It was exhilarating and new. He could reach for the sun without the fear of falling. He could be struck by Cupid’s arrow without the fear of dying. 

Jean felt this warmth surge of happiness traveling through his body. He smiled back at Jeremy, so in love he almost couldn’t breathe, and told the golden king, “I am as well.”

A word. As strong as a bell. As strong as a sunray. As strong as a wall. As strong as a storm. As strong as a heartbeat.

_ Love._

  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> hello everyone! you’ve finally reached the end of my fic. this was dedicated to the person that followed my progress from start to end, i love you best friend. this started as an idea and ended up being one of the things i’m most proud of. i hope you enjoyed reading about jeremy and jean’s story! all my love goes to you <3


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